half brothers
HALF-BROTHERS by Tim Finkbeiner timf248@yahoo.com
INT RESTAURANT KITCHEN - NIGHT
A Hispanic man, JUAN, 32, is one of five chefs cooking meals
in a large kitchen. He shouts orders to the other cooks.
JUAN
(calling down the line)
I need more shrimp!!
A stressed waitress, Michelle, comes into the kitchen.
MICHELLE
Juan, those people at table three.
They've been talking at the table
for an hour and won't even order an
appetizer. I'm not going to make
any money tonight.
Juan slides her a plate of appetizers.
JUAN
Here, compliments of the chef.
Michelle smile appreciatively at Juan.
MICHELLE
You're the best, Juan.
And she walks out the kitchen doors.
INT CLOTHING DESIGN HOUSE - DAY
An Asian American man, HWAN, 34, is walking around a design
studio looking at clothing designed by his designers. He
peeks over a woman's shoulder as she draws a shirt.
HWAN
Very nice, Alice.
She looks up and smiles.
INT HOUSE PLUMBING SUPPLY STORE - DAY
A customer is leaving the counter of a plumbing supply store.
The store owner, JOHNNY, a light-skinned African-American
man, 36, comes out from under the sink and smiles at the
unseen customer and turns to the other man, FRED, at the
counter.
JOHNNY
(satisfied smile)
All set and now I'm going to go do
owner-type stuff.
Johnny grabs his golf
FRED
(smiling)
Hit'em straight.
INT COLLEGE CLASSROOM - DAY
A college professor, JON, 33 and white, is in front of his
class.
JON
Hemingway wrote "I had been getting
something for nothing. That only
delayed the presentation of the
bill. The bill always came. That
was one of the swell things you
could count on." Now can anyone
tell me...
INT JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Juan is watching golf on television in his small but neat
house in Los Angeles. His wife, Gabby, 28, calls to him from
the other room.
GABBY
Any chance you can make it into the
kitchen to help me with this sauce?
I can't get it right.
JUAN
Sure baby, just a second, Sergio
has a four-footer for eagle.
Two boys, Mario,9, and Omar,6, run through the living room
past the television.
JUAN (CONT'D)
Hey!
The boys laugh and jump around in front of the television
obscuring his view. They thoroughly enjoy teasing their
adoring father.
INT HWANS BROWNSTONE - DAY
Hwan is practicing his putting in the well-appointed study of
his New York City brownstone. His wife, LANI, 32, comes to
the door. A violin plays in the background.
LANI
Dinner's here. That pizza you
really like, with crab and that
stuff.
The putt slides into the practice cup. He gives a big smile
for his wife.
HWAN
Why can't I do that on the course?
She shrugs her shoulders and returns his smile. A seven-year
old girl, Meika, joins her mother at the door carrying the
violin.
EXT JOHNNYS HOUSE - DAY
Johnny is practicing his chipping in his backyard in a upper
middle-class suburb of Cleveland. His two children TOMMIE, 10
and CANDY, 8, watch him. He takes his club back and is
starting his downswing when a scream -
JACKI
JOHNNY!!
Johnny miss-hits the ball, sending it CRASHING through a
window. The kids giggle at this. He looks up to see the sound
of the scream. His wife, JACKI, 32, is at the back door
holding their three-year-old son MORRIS.
JACKI (CONT'D)
Nice shot Tiger.
He puts the club down and walks toward the house.
CANDY
Uh-oh, Dad's in trouble.
Candy and Tommie giggle at Johnny. He gives them a mock mean
look. They giggle a little more.
INT JONS HOUSE - DAY
Jon is cleaning his golf equipment on the kitchen table at
his farmhouse in Oklahoma watching golf on television.
His son BUD, 4, is having a snack, watching father clean his
clubs. His wife, BETH, 32, comes into the kitchen. She
doesn't appear very happy.
BETH
I've ask you not to clean your golf
things in the kitchen. All those
pesticides they use on the courses
are harmful.
Jon isn't really listening. He's watching the golf tournament
on T.V.
JON
(looking up)
Huh?
Their daughter MELINDA, 6, joins them in the kitchen.
BETH
I said to get your balls off the
table.
The kids laugh at this request as Beth turns red, realizing
what she said.
INT HOSPITAL ROOM - NIGHT
Detroit, Michigan - In a critical-care room lit only by
glowing machines, an old man of mixed race, JOHN WERTZ, 72,
struggles for his life. His heartbeats are slow and measured
in rhythmic beeps on one of the many machines that surround
him. Another machine breathes for him. He his life is
measured in days, maybe hours, maybe minutes.
ON HIS HEARTBEAT
Beep, beep, beep beeeeeeeeeeeee. The sound continues. The old
man FLATLINES. Alarms go off. A NURSE comes into the room and
looks at the machines and his chart. No heroic efforts will
be made to prolong his life.
A DOCTOR enters the room and checks the machines then picks
up the charts. He makes an entry in the charts. The final
entry.
DOCTOR
(writing on the chart)
Any next of kin?
NURSE
Not that we can find. He's been
here a month and he hasn't had any
visitors at all. Kinda sad.
DOCTOR
(looking up)
No wife or kids?
NURSE
Or brother or sisters. Just a law
firm listed on here. Should I call
them?
DOCTOR
Not tonight. Nobody would be there
now anyway. Leave a note to have
someone call in the morning.
NURSE
I will.
He finishes the brief exam and walks out of the room. The
nurse covers the man with a sheet.
INT LAW FIRM OFFICE - CRAIGS OFFICE - DAY
In his small law office, a young lawyer, CRAIG JURICH, 26, is
busy working. As the junior partner, all the phone calls that
nobody else wants get directed to him. A voice comes over the
phone.
ELISE (O.S.)
Craig, there's a call from Oakwood
hospital. A nurse says one of our
clients has passed away.
CRAIG
Why is a hospital calling us about
it?
ELISE (O.S.)
I'm not sure.
Craig picks up the phone.
CRAIG
Hello, this is Craig Jurich, how
can I help you?
INT LAW FIRM OFFICE - ELISES CUBICLE - DAY
Craig walks out of his office to the desk of his
administrative assistant, ELISE STOTT. Elise is 25 and very
pretty beneath her professional looking glasses and smart
business suit. Her hair is up in a bun. She takes pride in
her job and is very good at it. She will make a great lawyer
after she graduates from law school.
CRAIG
(still confused)
That was a strange call. The law
firm was listed as the next-of-kin.
ELISE
No family?
CRAIG
I guess not. Can you pull his file
for me?
He hands her a piece of paper with John Wertz's name on it.
ELISE
Sure thing, Craig.
INT LAW FIRM - CRAIGS OFFICE - DAY
Craig is in his office reading the file. He calls Elise.
CRAIG
Elise, when is Daniel going to be
back?
ELISE (O.S.)
Next Tuesday. I can get him on the
phone if you need him.
CRAIG
No, I don't want to bother him on
the golf course. This guy isn't
going to get any deader. Will you
call the hospital back and see what
we need to do?
ELISE (O.S.)
Sure.
EXT CEMETERY - MORNING
A gray morning. Four people including a priest stand around a
plain casket. There are no tears because nobody here knew
actually the man in the casket. A single flower arrangement
sits near the casket. The priest says the prayer of
absolution.
PRIEST
O God, Whose attribute it is always
to have mercy and to spare, we
humbly present our prayers to Thee
for the soul of Thy servant which
Thou has this day called out of
this world, beseeching Thee not to
deliver it into the hands of the
enemy, nor to forget it for ever,
but to command Thy holy angels to
receive it, and to bear it into
paradise; that as it has believed
and hoped in Thee it may be
delivered from the pains of hell
and inherit eternal life through
Christ our Lord. Amen
The other in attendance utter a low Amen as the casket is
lowered into the ground. Elise is shown walking away from the
burial.
INT LAW FIRM OFFICE - DANIELS OFFICE - DAY
Craig knocks on the door of the large office of senior
partner DANIEL FRANKLIN. Daniel is an old-school lawyer;
whose father and his father's father were lawyers. Daniel is
on the phone and ushers Craig into the room. Daniel ends his
phone call and smiles at Craig.
CRAIG
How'd you play?
DANIEL
(wistful)
Same as always. My putting lets me
down.
CRAIG
Nice courses?
DANIEL
Very green and very long. I saw the
email about Mr. Wertz. Funny that
he passed while I was golfing. He
invited me to golf at Oakland Hills
the first time I met him. Is it all
taken care of?
CRAIG
Most of it. Elise made all the
arrangements.
DANIEL
She send flowers?
CRAIG
Yep.
Craig sets the file on Daniels desk.
DANIEL
Good girl. Tell her I said thanks.
CRAIG
His file seems incomplete. Did I
miss something when I was reading
it? He kept us on small retainer
for over thirty-five years. Doesn't
look like we have done much for him
in the past fifteen years.
Daniel leans back.
DANIEL
(remembering)
John Wertz was an odd man. The old
man wanted children, but never
wanted to get married because of
his own childhood, one orphanage
after another. His parents never
married and...
The scene closes before we hear the story.
INT LAW FIRM - ELISES CUBICLE - DAY
Craig walks comes from the hall to Elise's cube.
CRAIG
And I thought the hospital call was
odd.
He hands her some papers.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
Let me know if you have any
questions.
ELISE
I will.
INT LAW FIRM - CRAIGS OFFICE - DAY
Craig is in his office on the computer. Elise buzzes in on
the phone.
ELISE (O.S.)
Are you sure I'm suppose to send
these out to them? Wouldn't it be
better to let them know in person?
CRAIG
That's what I thought too, but it's
Daniel's call.
ELISE (O.S.)
Okay.
CRAIG
Are you available that weekend? It
will be paid, of course.
ELISE
Sure, whatever you need.
CRAIG
Thanks. I'm going to need some
help.
A call buzzes in to Elise. A second later -
ELISE (O.S.)
Craig, it's Tanya on two.
CRAIG
Thanks.
He pushes a button on the phone.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
Hi honey, how are you?
He goes back to his work, listening to her talk at him.
INT JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Gabby is walking into her house carrying the mail. She sorts
through the envelopes and junk mail. Juan is on the couch
building a model car with their sons MARIO, 9, and OMAR, 6.
OMAR
Can we paint flames on it?
MARIO
Yea, let's pimp this bitch.
Gabby glares at Juan, knowing his mouth is at fault for the
boy's bad language.
JUAN
(to Mario)
Hey, watch that shit.
Another disapproving look from Gabby. She pulls out an
envelope from the pile and looks at it.
GABBY
(almost accusing)
It's from a law firm in Michigan.
She hands him the envelope. He looks at the return address
and at her questioning eyes.
JUAN
I have no idea.
He opens the letter and reads it silently. His face goes
ashen.
GABBY
What is it?
He can barely speak the words.
JUAN
My father.
Mario's ears perk up.
MARIO
Tata?
JUAN
No, Mario, my birth father.
GABBY
Didn't he die before you were born?
JUAN
That's what I was told.
He's too stunned to talk much.
INT ADYONAS HOUSE - DAY
Juan is now over his mother, ADYONA'S, house holding the
letter from the lawyer. Adyona, a proud 68-year-old woman of
Mexican descent, looks ashamed as the truth is unfolding
after all these years.
JUAN
He was alive all these years and
you never told me.
ADYONA
I didn't tell you because I didn't
know, Juan.
JUAN
You didn't know? You told me he
died before I was born.
Adyona won't look at him.
JUAN (CONT'D)
My whole life I thought I knew who
I was, now I'm not sure.
He picks up the letter and starts reading.
JUAN (CONT'D)
Dear Mr. Wertz, It is with deep
regret that we inform you of the
passing of your father, John Alan
Wertz --
INT JONS HOUSE - DAY
Jon is reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JON
-- on June twelfth, two thousand
and six. It is your late father's
request --
INT HWANS HOUSE - DAY
Hwan is reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
HWAN
-- that you attend a gathering with
your immediate family for an all
expenses paid --
INT JOHNNYS HOUSE - DAY
Johnny is reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JOHNNY
-- trip July twelfth through July
sixteenth. At that time, all
matters regarding --
INT JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Juan continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JUAN
-- the estate including the reading
of the --
INT JONS HOUSE - DAY
Jon continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JON
-- will and distribution of assets--
INT HWANS HOUSE - DAY
Hwan continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
HWAN
-- will be completed, including
making --
INT JOHNNYS HOUSE - DAY
Johnny continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JOHNNY
-- the acquaintance of your
brothers.
INT JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Juan continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JUAN
-- your brothers.
INT JONS HOUSE - DAY
Jon continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
JON
-- your brothers.
INT HWANS HOUSE - DAY
Hwan continues reading the same letter aloud to his wife.
HWAN
-- your brothers.
Hwan puts down the letter and let's the words sink in.
INT JONS TRAVEL TRAILER - DAY
Jon is packing clothing into their travel trailer for the
trip. He is putting the clothes in a closet. Winter clothes.
Beth walks in and sees him putting the winter clothes in the
closet.
BETH
(concerned)
Are you okay?
Jon turns.
JON
Yea, fine. Why?
BETH
Because you are packing winter
clothes and it's July.
Jon looks at the clothes and shrugs. Bud comes into the
trailer carrying Jon's golf shoes.
BUD
(excited)
Daddy, you left you golf shoes in
the house.
Bud hands them to Jon who takes them and hugs his son
tightly.
JON
Thanks, Bud.
Bud is squirming uncomfortably.
BUD
Daddy, you're squishing me.
Jon lets his son go and smiles at him.
JON
Just appreciating you.
Jon and Beth smile at their son as Melinda climbs into the
trailer carrying pails and shovels for the beach.
MELINDA
Can we go to the beach every day?
BETH
The cabin we are staying in is
right on the beach. We can go there
every day if you want.
MELINDA
If we are staying in a cabin, why
are we taking the trailer?
JON
I don't have to be on campus until
the middle of August so I figured
we could take some time and camp in
upper Michigan. Near where
Hemingway wrote about in his story
"Big Two-Hearted River."
BETH
One of my favorites.
BUD
Are we going fishing?
JON
Sure are.
MELINDA
What else is there to do at the
cabin?
JON
The brochure said we can fish,
swim, ride horses, play baseball,
basketball. Lots of things.
MELINDA
Will there be other kids there?
Jon and Beth look at each other.
JON
Maybe. I'm not sure honey.
MELINDA
I hope so. I'd like some new
cousins.
EXT JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Juan is outside of his house packing suitcases into their van
for the trip to the airport. Mario is playing his Gameboy.
JUAN
Better not play too much, the
batteries will run out. It's a six
hour plane ride to Detroit.
Mario keeps playing.
MARIO
I'll plug it in.
JUAN
No plugs on the plane.
Gabby comes walking out with a suitcase.
GABBY
I think it was a brave thing your
mother did. Having a child on her
own because she didn't need a man
around. Very progressive.
JUAN
(annoyed)
Yea, right, Adyona the feminist.
GABBY
Why are you being so hard on her?
JUAN
Because I grew up without a father,
without anyone but her. And it was
selfish.
GABBY
Now you have brothers. Aren't you
excited about meeting them?
JUAN
So they can tell me about all I
missed growing up without them? So
I can listen to them talk about
what a great guy "Dad" was? I'm
just going there for the money,
that's it.
That said, he takes the suitcase from her and puts it in the
van. Omar walks out carrying his backpack which is over
filled with toys.
JUAN (CONT'D)
(smiling)
Got enough in there?
Omar smiles and nods to his dad.
INT HWANS HOUSE - DAY
Hwan is bringing another piece of their matching luggage to
the street, where Lani is watching for their limousine. Meika
stands near them practicing her violin. Meika finishes a
beautiful piece.
HWAN
Bach or Beethoven?
MEIKA
Neither. Lennon and McCartney.
HWAN
(mock thinking)
I've heard of them.
She smiles at him and puts the violin away.
MEIKA
Dad, what's the resort like? Does
it have a pool? Stores?
HWAN
It's not a resort, but it's on a
lake.
Hwan is checking all the bags against a list.
MEIKA
What are we going to do there?
HWAN
We are going to play basketball,
fish, swim, ride horses, hike.
She wrinkles her nose.
MEIKA
Any museums?
HWAN
Not that I know of. It's a small
town. Not much there, I don't
think.
LANI
Are there any good restaurants
there?
HWAN
Probably some small ones in town.
We are going to have to do most of
the cooking in the cabin.
MEIKA
(skeptically)
Mom's going to cook?
Lani takes offense.
LANI
(defensive)
Hey, I can cook.
MEIKA
Then why do we eat out every night?
Hwan doesn't want to talk about this subject.
HWAN
(diplomatically)
Because I like to eat out.
Lani waves to an approaching limo.
LANI
Here it comes.
The large limo parks near them.
EXT JOHNNYS HOUSE - DAY
Johnny and family are packing their Lincoln Navigator for
their trip.
TOMMIE
Remember that one time we went to
the beach and Dad caught his shirt
on fire making dinner?
CANDY
And then ran into the water.
She giggles.
JOHNNY
That's an old Indian ritual.
Suppose to bring good luck and a
good harvest for the year.
Jacki walks out of the house as Tommie walks back into the
house.
CANDY
Mommy, remember when Daddy caught
his shirt on fire?
JACKI
Which time baby?
Johnny gives her a look.
CANDY
The time when we went to the beach.
Before the last time with the
hamburgers.
JACKI
(knowing look at him)
Oh yes, that old Indian ritual.
Tommie comes out carrying a bunch of fishing rods.
TOMMIE
What are we going to do there
besides go fishing?
JOHNNY
All sorts of fun things. Waterski,
swim, ride horses, play baseball.
CANDY
We don't do those things, Daddy.
Johnny smiles at her.
JOHNNY
Maybe it's time we started.
TOMMIE
Dad, are you excited about meeting
your brothers? Wouldn't it be cool
if one was a famous guy. Like a
football player or hip-hop
producer.
Jacki doesn't like this attitude.
JACKI
What about a famous chef or
college professor? Maybe a
scientist?
Tommie makes a face.
CANDY
Or a clothing designer.
TOMMIE
Like Diddy.
Johnny shakes his head.
JOHNNY
No brother of mine is going to be a
clothing designer. Us Wertz boys
are strong, proud black men. We
aren't clothing designers or cooks.
Johnny puts his arm around Tommie.
JACKI
We better get going if you want to
spend any time with your cousin.
INT LAW FIRM - CRAIGS OFFICE - MORNING
Craig is in his office on the computer. He is wearing casual
clothes for him which are Docker khaki and a Polo shirt.
Craig's girlfriend, Tanya, 26, is sitting in a chair sipping
coffee. She is a pretty woman and about twenty pounds over
the weight she wants to be.
TANYA
Do we have to stay there the whole
time?
CRAIG
Yes. It's not exactly a four-star
resort, but it will be fun. We will
be able to do lots of things there.
Tanya wrinkles her nose.
TANYA
Camping? Sports? Bugs? Sweat? No
thanks.
Craig tries to make it appealing to her.
CRAIG
There are stores there. Some
restaurants close by.
TANYA
I checked, nothing there is rated.
Probably fried food and burgers.
I can't eat that stuff. It makes me
break out.
CRAIG
We won't be eating out much anyway.
Elise walks into his office carrying a large cardboard box.
She looks adorable in an oversized Tigers baseball jersey,
hat, shorts and tennis shoes. Her hair is pulled back in a
pony-tail. She is very cheerful this morning, ready for a
paid vacation.
ELISE
Hi guys.
TANYA
I'm a woman.
Tanya doesn't care for Elise and the feeling is starting to
become mutual.
ELISE
Sorry Tanya, figure of speech.
Craig finishes up and turns off the computer and puts a four
envelopes into a manila folder which he puts in his
briefcase.
CRAIG
Can't forget the inheritance
paperwork. Are we ready for a
weekend of fun?
ELISE
Yep.
TANYA
Are we actually supposed to go
there and have fun? I thought it
was work.
CRAIG
It's a little work.
TANYA
Sounds like we are playing camp
counselors for a bunch of kids.
ELISE
I was a camp counselor. It was a
blast.
Tanya looks at her with amusement.
TANYA
What's fun about being around a
bunch of screaming brats?
Elise opens the box and pulls out a light green polo shirt
with a logo. The logo says Wertz.
ELISE
Like them? Daniel had them made.
Tanya looks at it.
TANYA
(Sarcastic)
Nice color.
CRAIG
Those aren't bad.
ELISE
Glad you like it, there's one for
each attendee.
EXT LAW FIRM - LATER
Craig, Tanya and Elise are standing in the parking lot
watching Craig pack the last of Tanya's many bags in the
trunk of his BMW.
TANYA
Be careful, that one has my makeup
in it.
CRAIG
We are going to a cabin and
camping. Why do you need so much
makeup?
Tanya glares at Craig and he understands. Craig finally gets
the bag situated. He looks at Elise who is holding a single
green army duffle bag.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
That's all you have?
ELISE
That's it. I'm a light packer.
TANYA
That army training comes in handy
sometimes, I guess.
Elise smiles, not realizing that it wasn't a compliment
coming from Tanya.
CRAIG
That's not going to fit in here,
it's going to have to go in the
back seat.
ELISE
That's fine; I don't take up much
room.
An unintended dig at Tanya's weight. Elise puts her bag in
the back seat and climbs in the back seat as Craig and Tanya
climb in the front seats.
INT AIRPORT - DAY
Juan and his family are walking down the jetway looking very
tired and receiving contemptible looks from other passengers
disembarking. The boys are full of energy and running around.
INT AIRPORT - DAY
Hwan and his family are walking down a different jetway
looking refreshed and happy. Meika is receiving adoring looks
and kind words from the other passengers disembarking.
EXT CITY STREET - DAY
Johnny and his family are driving around a city neighborhood
looking for his cousin's home. The kids are bored and
restless. Johnny is looking down at messy directions written
down on Tommie's old history homework.
JOHNNY
Okay, look for Lincoln Street. It
should be around here somewhere.
Tommie hears the name and looks at the directions.
JACKI
I didn't see it twenty minutes ago.
Try his phone again.
Johnny dials his cell phone again.
TOMMIE
Dad?
JOHNNY
Not now son, I'm trying to find it.
TOMMIE
But Dad…
JOHNNY
Zip it.
Tommie slumps back in his seat.
CUT TO:
Twenty minutes later they are still driving around, still
lost, still looking for Lincoln.
TOMMIE
Dad?
JOHNNY
What?
TOMMIE
Lincoln was my homework answer, not
the street you are looking for.
JOHNNY
What?
Johnny looks closer at the directions. Tommie is right; they
have been looking for the wrong street.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
Why didn't you tell me before?
TOMMIE
I tried. You told me to shut it.
JOHNNY
You were wrong not telling me I was
wrong. Got it? Next time I'm wrong,
but I don't think I'm wrong, you
can tell me I'm wrong, right?
This confuses everyone.
TOMMIE
(unsure how to answer)
Right. I guess.
EXT HIGHWAY - DAY
Jon is driving their large F350 down the highway hauling
their travel trailer. Beth is reading a novel. Melinda is
watching the DVD player while Bud plays with his Gameboy.
Suddenly Bud looks up with great urgency.
BUD
Dad, I gotta go.
Jon turns around.
JON
Now? Didn't you just go a half hour
ago?
BUD
I did, but I gotta go again.
BETH
(to Bud)
Honey, can you hold it for a little
while?
BUD
I'll try, but I drank a lot of
water.
Jon sees an exit sign.
JON
Three miles. A rest stop.
EXT REST STOP - DAY
The truck and trailer come to a stop in the rest area.
INT REST STOP BATHROOM - DAY
Jon and Bud walk into the men's bathroom. All the stalls are
in use. Jon looks at the urinal and at a squirming Bud.
AT THE URINAL
Jon is holding Bud up so the small boy can use the urinal.
Bud goes and goes.
JON
How much water did you drink?
BUD
I don't know.
Finally Bud stops peeing. Jon reaches around to pull up Bud's
shorts. Opps, a little squirt of pee on Jon's clean shirt.
JON
I thought you were done.
BUD
I did too.
Bud smiles sheepishly at his daddy. Jon can't be mad at his
son.
INT AIRPORT - LUGGAGE CAROUSEL - DAY
Juan and his family are looking for their luggage as the
luggage comes out of the chute. Juan picks one piece, then
another.
INT AIRPORT - LUGGAGE CAROUSEL - DAY
Juan and his family stand around their pile of luggage. They
try to pick up all the pieces but there are too many for them
all to carry. Juan looks around and spies a luggage cart that
is not in use.
INT AIRPORT - DIFFERENT LUGGAGE CAROUSEL - DAY
Hwan and his family stand around their pile of matching
luggage. They are looking for a porter to cart their luggage
to their vehicle. Hwan sees Juan pushing the cart. Hwan walks
toward Juan.
ON JUAN
Juan reaches the luggage cart and
start pushing it toward his
luggage. As he starts moving Hwan
arrives.
HWAN
Excuse me -
Juan stops and looks at Hwan.
JUAN
Yea?
HWAN
Can you help us?
Juan is confused.
JUAN
What do you need?
HWAN
We need our luggage taken to the
rental counter then to the car.
Hwan tries to slip Juan a twenty-dollar bill. Juan is
surprised.
JUAN
(offended)
What the hell are you doing?
Hwan is puzzled.
HWAN
Trying to get you to help?
JUAN
Do I look like I work here?
HWAN
I'm sorry.
JUAN
(angry)
Do I look like I should be loading
others peoples luggage?
Hwan looks at his attire once more.
HWAN
I made a mistake, I'm sorry if I
offended you.
Juan starts moving with the cart and looks around to see that
his shirt looks like the ones the porters are wearing.
JUAN
Next time, don't assume the closest
minority is the help.
Hwan goes back to Lani and Meika who witnessed the
confrontation.
LANI
What was that all about?
HWAN
I thought he was a porter. He took
offense.
MEIKA
He looked mad. I thought he was
going to hit you.
HWAN
Grown-ups do not resolve conflicts
that way, honey.
We talk about our differences and
come to an understanding.
MEIKA
Especially if he's bigger than you.
HWAN
That too.
INT AIRPORT - LUGGAGE CAROUSEL - DAY
Juan pushes the luggage cart back to the pile of luggage.
Juan starts piling them on the cart. Gabby has seen the
encounter Juan had with Hwan.
GABBY
What was that about?
JUAN
He thought I was a damn porter. Do
I look like one?
Gabby looks around at the other porters who are wearing a
shirt that looks like Juan's.
GABBY
I can see where he could make that
mistake. I'm sure he didn't mean
it.
JUAN
It's just embarrassing. I should
have asked him if he was selling
some sushi or something.
GABBY
That would have been mature, a real
nice example for the boys to see,
Daddy beating up an Asian man at
the airport.
INT AIRPORT - LATER
Luggage cart now loaded, Juan and his family are finding
their way to the rental counter.
INT AIRPORT - SAME TIME
Unable to find a porter, Hwan pushes the loaded luggage, to
the rental counter. Lani and Meika follow him. Meika is
carrying her violin.
ON JUAN
Juan sees Hwan walking toward the same counter, he steps up
the pace.
ON HWAN
Hwan sees Juan walking toward the counter, he steps up the
pace.
ON JUAN
Juan's going faster.
ON HWAN
Faster.
ON BOTH
Both men are racing nearing the counter. Suddenly, Hwan's
cart takes a quick turn and falls over, sending luggage
scattering all over the floor.
ON JUAN
He sees Hwan's cart fall over and the luggage fly. He
chuckles. Gabby looks at him.
GABBY
How old are you?
JUAN
(satisfied)
Old enough to beat him.
He chuckles some more.
ON HWAN
Lani stands near as Hwan picks up the errant luggage.
LANI
What was that about?
HWAN
Just trying to get to the rental
counter.
MEIKA
Glad my violin wasn't on there.
INT AIRPORT RENTAL COUNTER - DAY
Hwan and family arrive in line. Juan looks back and smiles at
Hwan. A rental agent is now free and Juan steps up to the
counter.
COUNTER AGENT
Hi, how can I help you?
JUAN
Hi, I need a car for four days.
COUNTER AGENT
Do you have a reservation.
Juan forgot to make them.
JUAN
No, I...I was told I wouldn't need
one.
A lie.
COUNTER AGENT
Oh. Okay. Let me see what we have
available.
She hits a few keys.
COUNTER AGENT (CONT'D)
We just got a Hyundai Elantra back.
JUAN
How big is it?
COUNTER AGENT
It's a compact. One-hundred and
thirty-two dollars for four days.
JUAN
That's all? You don't have anything
bigger? Like a van or an Explorer
or something?
COUNTER AGENT
I'm afraid everything else is
reserved, sir.
JUAN
I guess I'll have to take it.
Juan pulls out his wallet and hands her a credit card. She
takes the card and starts the process.
COUNTER AGENT
Very good. That will be at least an
hour while we clean it.
JUAN
I don't need it cleaned, just give
me the keys and I'll go.
COUNTER AGENT
Let me make sure it has fuel.
JUAN
Okay.
The agent next to them opens and Hwan steps up to the
counter.
ON HWAN
Hwan hands the woman a rental car VIP club card. The agent
takes it and types in the information into her computer.
COUNTER AGENT
You are all set sir. I will have
them bring your Suburban around
front immediately. Will you need
help with your luggage?
HWAN
Yes, that would be great.
He looks up and smiles at a still-waiting Juan while the
agent makes a call. She hands him the paperwork.
COUNTER AGENT
They are pulling it around now.
Have a great weekend!
Hwan smiles at the helpful woman.
HWAN
Thank you.
Hwan walks away from the counter stealing a glance at Juan,
who is still waiting.
EXT AIRPORT RENTAL COUNTER - DAY
Hwan and family watch as their luggage is expertly loaded
into the gleaming SUV. Hwan climbs into the driver's seat and
waves a friendly good-bye to Juan.
INT AIRPORT RENTAL COUNTER - LATER
The rental agent steps back to the counter.
COUNTER AGENT
Your car has a full tank and is
ready.
The rental agent hands him the keys.
JUAN
Aren't they bringing it around?
COUNTER AGENT
I'm sorry sir, that is a privilege
that is reserved for our gold club
members.
Juan just wants to go.
JUAN
Fine, where is it parked?
COUNTER AGENT
It's parked in the south lot, sir.
The rental agent smiles politely. Juan walks away from the
counter.
EXT AIRPORT PARKING LOT - DAY
Juan and family are walking around the parking lot looking
for their car.
Still looking. The boys are now on the cart with the luggage.
Still looking. Gabby joins the boys on the cart while Juan
struggles pushing the cart.
MARIO
Dad, I think we are getting close
to home.
Juan just leans on the cart, out of breath.
Finally they reach the small car. It's about a mile away from
the airport. It sit's alone in the lot. Juan looks at the car
and the luggage. How is it going to fit? Gabby grabs the keys
and opens the door. She makes a face.
GABBY
Yuck!
The boys look at her.
GABBY (CONT'D)
Someone got sick in here, Juan.
Juan goes to the car and takes a whiff. He recoils.
JUAN
Eww, that's bad. Where's your
perfume, Gab?
EXT AIRPORT PARKING LOT - DAY
Juan and family are driving out of the parking lot, all of
the windows open and luggage filling the car.
EXT CITY STREET - DAY
Johnny is driving away while the family waves to their hosts
who are all gathered on the front lawn.
INT JOHNNYS NAVIGATOR - DAY
Johnny looks mad. Jacki notices Johnny's mood.
JACKI
What's the matter with you?
JOHNNY
What's the matter? How about me
spending the whole time there
installing a new sink that "just
happened to be there?"
JACKI
Its family and you're a plumber.
JOHNNY
Second cousins and when I'm on
vacation, I'm not a plumber, I was
a plumber, now I'm an owner. Right
now, I'm a guy on vacation. I
shouldn't have to work.
JACKI
It was nice of you anyway.
JOHNNY
And I get a lousy light beer.
JACKI
Just relax, in a couple hours,
you'll be meeting your brothers.
This thought brightens his mood.
JOHNNY
Yea.
He smiles and enters the highway entrance ramp.
EXT HIGHWAY - DAY
Jon is on the highway looking for the right exit. He is in
the center lane.
INT JONS TRUCK - DAY
Beth is trying to decipher the map and the exits.
BETH
I think you have to take the next
exit north.
Jon is looking in the mirrors, trying to get over into the
right lane.
JON
Okay, I need to get over.
Johnny's Navigator comes down the entrance ramp trying to get
into the flow of traffic. At the same time Jon's truck and
trailer move into the lane Johnny is trying to occupy.
INT JOHNNYS NAVIGATOR - DAY
Johnny is looking ahead, thinking he's got it made when Jon's
rig moves into the lane that Johnny is trying to get into. He
swerves to avoid an accident then brakes and settles in
behind the trailer.
JOHNNY
That goddamn asshole wants the
whole road.
He beeps the horn.
JACKI
I don't think he saw you.
JOHNNY
(referring to Jon's rig)
No shit. Look at that huge thing,
it's a menace.
He tries to get next to Jon's truck. Traffic is too heavy.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
Why's he here anyway? No
campgrounds. Just clogging my
highway.
He beeps the horn again.
INT JONS TRUCK - DAY
Johnny's beep is heard.
JON
What's he beeping at?
BETH
I don't know.
MELINDA
Maybe he's in a hurry.
EXT HIGHWAY - DAY
Johnny's car pulls out and -
INT HWANS SUBURBAN - DAY
--cuts off Hwan who has to brake to avoid hitting Johnny.
HWAN
Damn asshole!!
Hwan starts to speed up.
LANI
Honey, don't, he looks really mad.
HWAN
He almost hit me, you saw it.
A look and Hwan starts to slow down, still angry. Lani is
happy he is slowing.
LANI
Thank you.
INT JONS TRUCK - DAY
Bud is looking out the window at Johnny's car. Johnny is
leaning over and yelling and pointing at the truck. A smiling
Bud waves to Johnny.
INT JOHNNYS NAVIGATOR - DAY
Johnny and Jacki see Bud waving at them.
JACKI
Look, that cute little boy is
waving at us.
She waves back.
JOHNNY
Why are you waving at him?
JACKI
Because he's waving at us. Look
kids, that little boy is waving.
Little Morris looks and waves an enthusiastic wave back. Bud
smiles at him.
Johnny speeds up to get next to Jon.
INT JONS TRUCK - DAY
Jon won't look over at Johnny's car. His eyes are straight
ahead.
BUD
Daddy, that man is talking to you.
Jon steals a glance.
JON
No, he's not talking to me, Bud.
BUD
I think he is. He's pointing at
you.
MELINDA
No he's not, he's pointing up at
the ceiling. He's not using his
pointing finger though.
Jon and Beth look over to see Johnny giving them the finger.
Johnny then speeds up and pulls away from them.
INT JOHNNYS NAVIGATOR - DAY
Johnny is pissed.
INT HWANS SUBURBAN - DAY
Hwan is pissed.
INT JONS TRUCK - DAY
Jon is pissed.
INT JUANS CAR - DAY
Juan is pissed.
INT CRAIGS BMW - LATER
Craig, Tanya and Elise are driving up to the cabin in his
BMW. Elise has been trying to make small talk with Tanya to
no avail. After a moment of quiet.
ELISE
It's getting so nice outside, it's
going to be a good weekend. So
Tanya, have you done much camping?
As a kid?
TANYA
Never, we always went to Florida
and stayed in hotels.
ELISE
We use to go all the time. I love
it.
TANYA
What's to love? Bugs, dirt nobody
to cook for you. I don't see the
point.
Craig tries to lighten the mood.
CRAIG
(to Tanya)
We went a couple times. Some good
childhood memories.
Elise
ELISE
Can we turn the air up? I'm a
little warm back here.
TANYA
No, I'm a little chilly.
Elise rolls her eyes.
ELISE
(to herself)
No kidding.
CRAIG
You can open the window a little,
Elise.
Elise opens the window. A breeze fills the car.
TANYA
Oh, no, my hair.
Elise closes the window and sighs heavily. Craig sees a sign
for a rest stop.
CRAIG
There's a rest stop ahead.
ELISE
Great.
EXT REST STOP - LATER
Craig and Tanya are looking at a map outside of the rest
stop. The door to the rest rooms opens and Elise comes out of
the building. She is wearing a different top. Very different.
Instead of the oversized baseball jersey or the business
outfits she wears at work, she is in a tight top that shows
off her breasts and a great figure. In slow motion, she walks
closer to Craig and Tanya.
ON CRAIG
Craig can't help but look at Elise.
ON TANYA
She's not happy at all as Elise walks to them.
ELISE
Are we ready to go?
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
In the parking lot, Hwan and his family are exiting their
vehicle. Hwan is anxious; he has to use the restroom.
HWAN
I'm going in; I have to…go.
LANI
Okay honey.
Hwan rushes into the restaurant.
INT MCDONALDS - DAY
Jon and Bud are inside the McDonalds walking toward the
bathroom.
BUD
But I don't have to go.
JON
You're going to try anyway.
Behind them, Hwan is walking very fast and catching up. Jon
and Bud are walking slow, taking their time. Suddenly Bud
stops and looks up at Jon.
JON (CONT'D)
What's wrong?
BUD
My shoe. It's untied.
JON
Well, tie it.
Bud bends down to tie his shoe. Hwan is attempting to pass
them, but Jon and Bud are blocking the isle.
HWAN
Excuse me, can I get through?
Jon smiles at Hwan.
JON
We'll just be a second.
Bud is struggling with his shoe. Hwan is almost at the
breaking point. Hwan can't wait anymore and starts climbing
over one of the booths. He slips and comes down hard on the
table. Bud is done with his shoe and laughs at Hwan who is
lying on the table.
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
Juan pulls into the McDonalds parking lot from one entrance
while Johnny pulls in from another. Both are looking for an
empty parking spot in the crowded lot. Both cars go to the
back of the lot. There is one empty space. Both men see the
spot at the same time.
They speed to the spot and both try to enter the spot at the
same time. Both cars stop to avoid hitting each other.
Windows are rolled down. The guys start talking to each
other.
JOHNNY
Hey man, back up, this is my spot.
He waves his arm backwards.
JUAN
No way, I was in first.
JOHNNY
My car is in further, you can tell
by the angle.
JUAN
Angle? Great, Billy the math whiz
wants my parking spot.
INT JUANS CAR - DAY
Juan slumps back in his seat. Gabby looks around.
GABBY
There's another spot over there.
Let's just park there.
JUAN
No, I'm not letting him have the
spot.
INT JOHNNYS CAR NAVIGATOR - DAY
Johnny and family sit in the car.
JOHNNY
I'm not moving. I'll sit here all
damn day.
JACKI
That's very mature of you.
She looks back at the kids.
JACKI (CONT'D)
C'mon kids, we are going in to eat.
They exit the car.
INT JUANS CAR - DAY
Gabby watches the other family leave their car.
GABBY
That's a good idea. Come on boys,
we are going to get something to
eat.
They exit the car.
JUAN
I'll take a Big Mac meal.
GABBY
Then you better find a parking
spot.
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
Gabby and the kids are walking toward the doors and Gabby
holds the door for Jacki and her kids.
JACKI
Getting him anything?
GABBY
Not even a ketchup packet.
JACKI
Good girl.
The women smile at each other.
INT MCDONALDS - OUTSIDE BATHROOM DAY
Hwan is waiting outside the bathroom for Jon and Bud to come
out. He's been waiting a while and is agony. He glares at Jon
who returns the glare.
INT MCDONALDS - LINES - DAY
It's a busy lunchtime rush. There are six registers taking
customers orders. All four men are standing in different
lines. Hwan and Jon are eyeing each other. Juan recognizes
Hwan from the airport. Johnny, who has been eyeing Juan,
recognizes Jon from the highway.
One of the lines that none of the men are standing in moves
up. Juan moves up in that line. Juans old line moves up and
Jon moves to that line. Jons line moves up and Hwan and
Johnny move to that line, Johnny getting there a bit sooner.
Hwan moves back to his old line but another customer has
arrived and taken his place.
One of the lines that none of the men are standing in moves
up. Hwan moves up in that line.
Hwans old line moves up and Juan moves to that line. Juans
line moves up and Jon and Johnny move to that line, Jon
getting there a bit sooner. Johnny moves back to his old line
but another customer has arrived and taken his place.
INT MCDONALDS - TABLES - DAY
All the men are seated, eating lunch and pissed at all the
other men. They all sit and eat in silence, looking at the
other men. The kids are looking at the other kids and are
being kids, making faces and laughing.
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
Jon and his family climb into their truck and pull out of the
parking lot.
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
Minutes later, Juan and his family climb into their car and
leave.
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
Minutes later, Hwan and his family climb into their car and
leave.
EXT MCDONALDS - DAY
Minutes later, Johnny and his family climb into their vehicle
and leave.
INT CRAIGS BMW - LATER
Driving along the highway, the radio station fades in and
out. Tanya opens a small bag and pulls out a CD wallet. She
takes out a Coldplay CD and pops it into the CD player. Craig
and Elise grimace as Tanya sings along with the song.
EXT PARTY STORE - DAY
Jon pulls into a party store at the side of the road and
parks the truck and trailer.
INT JONS TRUCK – DAY
Jon turns to his family.
JON
Any requests?
BUD
Beef jerky.
MELINDA
Candy.
JON
What kind?
MELINDA
Gummy worms.
He looks to Beth.
BETH
Wine coolers. Please.
JON
What kind?
BETH
Cold ones.
He smiles and exits the vehicle.
INT STORE – DAY
Jon enters the small party store. Like most party stores in
the area, this store caters to campers and vacationers with
lots of beer, snacks, canned food, camping supplies, even
firewood. Jon walks to the snacks and picks out some gummy
worms then some beef jerky. He put the snacks on the counter
then turns to walk back to the cooler. The door opens and the
bell signals a customer. Johnny walks in the door. They
recognize each other from earlier incidents. They walk to the
cooler and Johnny reaches the cooler first. He opens the door
and grabs a case of Budweiser. The bell rings again and
another customer enters. It's Juan. This is getting weird.
Johnny takes his case of Bud and closes the door before Jon
can grab a case. Jon opens the door and grabs a case as Juan
waits behind him. Juan grabs a case of Bud, than looks in and
grabs the last cold case.
At the counter, the three men are waiting in line, waiting
for the elderly woman to ring up another customer. The door
opens and it's Hwan.
He looks at the three men in line then walks to the cooler.
At the cooler he looks at the gaping hole between the Bud
Light and the Miller cases of beer. He walks back to the
counter. He sees the three other men with cases of beer
HWAN
Excuse me; do you have any more
cold cases of Budweiser?
The old lady gives a customer his change and looks up.
CASHIER
Cold ones? I don't know. I'll go
check.
She walks away from the counter as the guys waiting in line
groan. They wait. And wait. And wait.
Finally they return to the counter, an unhappy Hwan carrying
a warm case of Bud. The other guys smile at his misfortune.
EXT CABINS - DAY
Craig, Tanya and Elise pull into the cabins parking lot. They
exit the car and take it all in. The five cabins are small
but cute. A large home sits on the road. A woman, MRS. CREWS,
78, walks slowly out of the house and toward the car. Craig
opens the trunk and they start to unload the luggage.
Mrs. Crews walks to the car. Craig greets her.
CRAIG
Mrs. Crews?
MRS. CREWS
You must be Craig. Hello.
They shake hands.
CRAIG
Hello.
MRS. CREWS
Welcome to Crews cabins. Do you
want to assign the cabins before
they get here or let them decide
when they get here?
CRAIG
Are they all the same?
MRS. CREWS
Except for the one on the beach,
it's a little larger.
TANYA
Good, we will take the one on the
water.
Craig ignores her.
CRAIG
We will give that one to Johnny, he
has three children. We can take the
first one up there.
He points to the house furthest from the beach. Tanya doesn't
like this. Mrs. Crews hands him the keys to all the cabins.
MRS. CREWS
The keys are all color coded to the
cabin shutters and trim. Just come
see me if you have any questions.
CRAIG
We will. Thanks.
Mrs. Crews turns and walks away. They resume unloading the
car.
TANYA
Where are you sleeping Elise?
CRAIG
She's sharing the cabin with us.
It's got two bedrooms.
Things keep getting worse for Tanya.
TANYA
There are no free cabins?
CRAIG
Four cabins left, four families.
ELISE
It will be fun.
TANYA
No restaurants, no shopping, no
privacy. How fun can it be?
She stomps off.
EXT CABINS - DAY
Craig is taking the last of the luggage into the cabin as
Johnny's car pulls into the parking lot and parks. Craig
moves to the car to greet him. Johnny exits the car and
stretches.
CRAIG
Mr. Wertz, Craig Jurich.
They shake hands.
JOHNNY
Johnny Wertz, good to meet you.
CRAIG
Nice to meet you.
Johnny looks around.
JOHNNY
Are they here?
CRAIG
You're the first, the rest of them
should be here soon.
JOHNNY
All of them?
CRAIG
They all said they were coming.
A big smile.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
(pointing)
You can take the big cabin right
there on the lake. You can unpack
your things and we will get
together on the beach a little
later.
Johnny takes the key Craig is offering and walks away.
INT JOHNNYS CABIN – DAY
Johnny, Jacki and the kids walk into the cabin carrying some
of their things. The big window looks over the beautiful
waters of the lake.
TOMMIE
Dad, where's the TV?
JOHNNY
Look at this beautiful view, son,
you don't need a television. It's
rotting all of your minds
The kids all groan and carry their things into the bedroom.
Johnny turns to Jacki.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
They can't take four days without
TV?
A condescending look from her.
JACKI
So you're leaving yours in the car?
JOHNNY
Hell no, you know I can't sleep
without it.
EXT CABINS - DAY - LATER
Juan's car pulls into the cabin parking lot. A waiting Craig
points to a parking spot and Hwan pulls in. Craig walks to
the car as Juan opens the door.
CRAIG
Mr. Wertz, Craig Jurich.
They shake hands.
JUAN
Juan, please.
The boys tear out of the car and race to the beach. Juan
calls after them.
JUAN (CONT'D)
Don't go in the water!!
A tired Gabby comes around from the other side of the car.
CRAIG
Craig Jurich. Nice to meet both of
you.
They all shake.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
You will be staying in the cabin
there with the red shutters.
Craig hands Juan the key.
JUAN
When will I meet them?
CRAIG
Soon enough, we are going to meet
on the beach when everyone gets
here.
Juan smiles and gets teary-eyed. He turns and walks to the
cabin. Gabby puts her arm around him.
EXT CABINS - DAY - LATER
Jon's rig pulls into the cabin parking lot. It's way too big
for the small parking lot. Craig walks to the truck as Jon is
opening the window.
CRAIG
That's quite a setup, Mr. Wertz. I
don't think it will fit here.
JON
Doesn't look like it.
CRAIG
Let me go check with the owners,
see if they have a place for you to
park.
JON
Okay.
Craig walks away.
INT JOHNNYS CABIN – DAY
Johnny is carrying his portable TV into his bedroom before
any of the kids can see it. Candy sees him.
CANDY
Thought there was no T.V., Dad?
JOHNNY
(quietly)
For your mother.
Candy doesn't believe him and he walks into his bedroom.
Putting the T.V. on the dresser, he hears the noisy diesel
engine of Jon's truck and looks out the window. He recognizes
the big truck that nearly hit him.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
What the hell?
Jacki walks in the bedroom.
JACKI
What's wrong?
Johnny points out the window.
JOHNNY
Look. That damn thing that almost
killed us is sitting in the parking
lot. What's he doing here?
JACKI
There's probably extra cabins they
have to rent out. Or he's lost.
Johnny seems satisfied with this.
EXT CABINS - DAY - LATER
Craig walks up to Jon's truck.
CRAIG
They said you can park the trailer
across the street in that lot.
JON
Thanks.
Craig hands him the key.
CRAIG
The green cabin is yours.
EXT CABINS - DAY - LATER
Hwan's car pulls into the cabin parking lot. Craig points to
a parking spot and Hwan pulls in. Craig walks to the car as
Hwan is opening the door.
CRAIG
Mr. Wertz, Craig Jurich.
They shake hands.
HWAN
Hwan Wertz.
Lani and Meika walk around from the other side of the car.
HWAN (CONT'D)
My wife Lani and daughter Meika.
CRAIG
Craig Jurich. Nice to meet both of
you.
He shakes both their hands.
MEIKA
Is there a pool?
CRAIG
I'm afraid not, but there is over
twenty-thousand square miles of
lake for you.
Craig points to the blue waters of Lake Huron.
LANI
Beautiful. I never realized how big
it is.
CRAIG
You have the cabin with the blue
shutters. You can unpack and we
will have a meeting down at the
beach and I'll explain everything
to you.
Hwan starts walking then turns.
HWAN
Are they here?
CRAIG
You'll meet soon enough.
EXT CABINS - DAY - LATER
Juan is walking from his car carrying suitcases. Johnny sees
him. Juan sees Johnny. They look each other, wondering what
the other is doing there. Jon's truck pulls up. They look at
him too. Hwan walks out to his car to get more luggage and
sees the other men looking at each other. They all recognize
each other and walk into their cabins.
INT JUAN'S CABIN – DAY
Juan walks into the cabin. Gabby is putting things away.
JUAN
Something's going on here.
He's confused.
INT JON'S CABIN – DAY
Jon walks into the cabin. Beth is putting things away.
JON
Something's going on here.
He's confused.
INT HWAN'S CABIN – DAY
Hwan walks into the cabin. Lani is putting away things.
HWAN
Something's going on here.
He's confused.
INT JOHNNY'S CABIN – DAY
Johnny walks into the cabin. Jacki is putting things away.
He's pissed.
JOHNNY
I think this is some sort of damn
timeshare vacation scam.
EXT HWANS CABIN - DAY - LATER
Craig walks to Hwan's cabin door.
CRAIG
Hwan, we need you for a short
meeting on the beach in five
minutes.
Hwan walks to the door.
HWAN
Okay.
EXT JUANS CABIN - DAY - LATER
Craig at Juan's cabin door.
CRAIG
Juan, we need you…
EXT JONS CABIN - DAY - LATER
Craig at Jon's cabin door.
CRAIG
Jon, we need you…
EXT JOHNNY'S CABIN - DAY - LATER
Craig at Johnny's cabin door.
CRAIG
Johnny, we need you…
EXT BEACH – EARLY EVENING
Beach chairs are gathered around a fire. Craig stands holding
the shirts. Elise is next to him holding large manila
envelopes. Jon arrives first, holding a Budweiser.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
Hi Jon, sit anywhere.
Jon sits as Juan walks up and takes a seat. He too is holding
a cold Bud.
JUAN
I have a few question...
Craig cuts him off.
CRAIG
I know everyone has lots of
questions and I'll answer them as
soon as the others get here.
Hwan walks up carrying his warm Bud and has a seat.
EXT JOHNNY'S CABIN - LATER
Johnny and Jacki are standing there talking. Johnny is
pissed.
JACKI
Just see what they say, we can
leave in the morning.
Johnny walks toward the beach. Jacki watches him go, Gabby
walks over to her. Jacki recognizes her from the Mcdonalds
incident.
JACKI (CONT'D)
Quite a coincidence, I'd say.
She extends a hand.
JACKI (CONT'D)
Jacki Wertz.
Gabby is stunned.
GABBY
That's not the only coincidence.
EXT JONS CABIN - LATER
Gabby and Jacki are at the door.
GABBY
Mrs. Wertz?
Beth comes to the door.
BETH
Yes?
EXT HWANS CABIN - LATER
Beth, Gabby and Jacki are at the door.
GABBY
Mrs. Wertz?
Lani comes to the door.
LANI
Yes?
Gabby, Beth and Jacki just look at each other.
EXT BEACH – LATER
The guys are all sitting in the beach chairs around a fire
holding their shirts and envelopes. A stack of diaries sits
on a chair.
CRAIG
Now that we are all here, let's
start by telling everyone your
names and ages. Then you can open
the envelopes and hopefully what's
inside will answer some of the
questions you have.
Hwan stands up.
HWAN
I'm Hwan Wertz. Thirty-four. I'm a
clothing designer.
Silence. The only sound is the lakes gentle ripples and the
sound of Johnny's eyes rolling back.
JUAN
I'm Juan Wertz, thirty-two and I'm
a chef.
They look at him. The men look at him and think the same
thing. "It can't be."
JON
I'm Jon Wertz, thirty-three.
History professor.
All eyes are on him. Johnny then stands.
JOHNNY
I'm... I may be named Johnny Wertz,
and you all cannot be my brothers.
He gets up.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
I don't know what kind of scam you
are trying to pull, Craig, but I'm
leaving.
CRAIG
Please wait, Johnny.
Johnny stops as Craig quickly pulls out a diary. He finds a
marked page and reads from it.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
"Today my son Johnny won the
hundred yard dash. I'm very proud
of him."
Johnny looks at him.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
Dated May 23, 1984.
Johnny is bewildered.
JOHNNY
I was in seventh grade. I won a
medal.
He sits and Craig goes to another page from the diary
CRAIG
Jon, do you remember fly-fishing
for the first time?
Jon thinks a moment.
JON
Upper Michigan, I think I was nine
or ten.
Craig reads from the diary once more.
CRAIG
July 23, 1983. Fished with my son
Jon today. Taught him to tie a tube
knot.
Jon wipes a tear.
JON
Some nice old guy in the cabin next
to us. He took me fishing. He was a
very patient man.
Craig reads from the diary again.
CRAIG
April 18, 1996. Watched my son Juan
graduate from college today with a
degree in culinary arts. He is a
fine chef and I have eaten his food
many times.
Craig quickly flips to another page.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
October 3, 1996. Hwan got married
today. It was a beautiful ceremony.
I wished I could have shared it
with him.
The men all look at each other in disbelief.
HWAN
But why?
CRAIG
I don't know for sure. Let me read
something he wrote just before he
died.
Craig grabs another diary and starts reading from a marked
passage.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
I have lived a life alone and full
of regrets. My sons are grown,
successful men with wonderful and
beautiful families. I wish I could
have been part of their lives, but
it was not to be.
The men all have a mix of emotions; confusion, anger, wonder,
longing.
JON
Can we read the diaries?
CRAIG
Of course, they belong to all of
you.
Johnny stands up.
JOHNHY
This is all bullshit. Some crazy
old guy says he's our father? Look
at us.
The cameras focus on all of their faces.
JOHNHY (CONT'D)
We aren't brothers, this is all
some bullshit. Just give me what
the old guy left me and let me go
home.
JUAN
Me too.
CRAIG
I'm afraid that I don't have the
power to do that. The will states
that his sons will spend some time
together; doing the things they
missed out on growing up. Then at
the end of that time, they will get
their inheritance and can decide if
they want to continue the
relationships with their brothers.
HWAN
Are we really related? Doesn't seem
biologically possible.
CRAIG
I don't know, I'm not a genetics
expert.
JOHNNY
He wasn't my father and no offense,
but you all aren't my brothers.
Johnny gets up to leave.
CRAIG
You don't want the inheritance?
JOHNNY
How much?
CRAIG
High five figures.
Looks all around. Not bad.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
I know this was a lot to digest. Go
sleep on it. Let me know in the
morning.
The men all get up and start walking back to their cabins,
leaving their cans of beer, but each taking one of the
diaries.
INT HWANS CABIN - LATER
Hwan walks in the door of the cabin. Lani is there waiting.
They look at each other.
LANI
(concerned)
Want to talk?
HWAN
Not yet.
He sits on the couch.
INT JONS CABIN - LATER
Jon walks in the door of the cabin. Beth is putting things
away. They look at each other.
BETH
How did it go?
JON
They say we are brothers.
BETH
What do you think?
JON
I'd say we are about the furthest
thing from brothers.
INT JUANS CABIN - LATER
Juan walks in the door of the cabin. The boys are running
around. Gabby comes out of the bedroom. Juan is in shock.
GABBY
Sit down, I'll get you a beer.
Juan sits as Gabby gets him a cold beer.
INT JOHNNYS CABIN - LATER
Johnny walks in the door of the cabin. Jacki is there
waiting. They look at each other.
JOHNNY
A cook, a clothing designer and a
college professor. Can you believe
that?
JACKI
So are we leaving?
JOHNNY
No.
JACKI
Good, the boys will have fun here.
You're a good father.
Johnny sits at the table.
JOHNNY
Thanks.
JACKI
Find anything out?
JOHNNY
A little. He knew of me, kept up
with what I was doing, even if he
wasn't my dad.
JACKI
Want to talk?
JOHNNY
Not now, I'm tired. It's been a
long day.
Jacki takes the envelope and the diary.
JACKI
Go to bed. I'll finish here.
EXT BEACH - NIGHT
The fire is dying as a group of four teenage boys walk past
fire and spy the open beers. They walk to the beers and check
the contents they drink the beers down and continue down the
beach just before Elise comes back to the beach carrying
plastic bags and a marker. She carefully takes each can and
puts it in a bag and labels the bags with the men's names.
EXT CRAIGS CABINS - MORNING
The sun is coming up over the horizon as Elise is finishing
up her morning run. She walks into the cabin.
INT CRAIGS CABIN – MORNING
Elise walks over to the refrigerator and takes out a cold
bottle of water and an apple. The bathroom door is closed and
the shower is running. The bedroom door opens and a scary
looking Tanya ambles out. The shower stops. She sits in the
chair and looks at Elise, healthy and glistening from her
run. Elise smiles at her.
ELISE
Sleep well?
TANYA
Not at all. The beds are terrible,
all the noises outside. Is the
coffee made?
Elise looks over at the coffeepot.
ELISE
Doesn't look like it.
Tanya groans as the bathroom door opens. Craig comes out of
the shower.
CRAIG
Good morning.
He walks into his bedroom.
TANYA
Nothing good about it.
Elise walks into her room and grabs a towel and quickly walks
back out and into the bathroom. The door closes. Craig comes
out of his room. The shower starts.
TANYA (CONT'D)
She didn't even make coffee.
CRAIG
I didn't know she was suppose to.
TANYA
Doesn't she work for you?
CRAIG
At work she does. It's not a big
deal, I'll make the coffee.
Tanya pouts a little.
TANYA
I have to go to the bathroom.
INT HWANS CABIN – MORNING
Meika and Lani are eating cereal. Hwan is on his cell phone
talking business.
MEIKA
All those kids are my cousins?
LANI
That's what they are saying.
INT JONS CABIN – MORNING
The entire family is eating a large breakfast.
BUD
What are we doing today?
JON
Not sure, we have to go and find
out what's planned for us.
INT JUANS CABIN – MORNING
The family is cleaning up after breakfast, except Gabby who
is continuing to read a diary.
GABBY
Did you know your father had two
patents? He was a very intelligent
man.
JUAN
He wasn't my father.
GABBY
He also grew up in orphanages,
never knew his parents. He was
mixed race and nobody wanted to
claim him.
JUAN
And?
GABBY
He must have been a terribly lonely
person.
INT JOHNNYS CABIN – MORNING
Breakfast is over and they are getting ready to go meet with
Craig.
TOMMIE
What are we going to do with the
money?
JOHNNY
We aren't going to do anything with
it. I am going to put it into your
college fund.
EXT BEACH – MORNING
The entire Wertz clan is gathered on the beach in a semi
circle around Craig.
CRAIG
I'm glad all of you decided to
stay. I hope you still feel that
way at the end of the long weekend.
Your father, Mr. Wertz if you
prefer, wanted you all to do the
things you never go to do as
brothers. Elise will you please
read the itinerary?
Elise stands and produces a piece of paper.
ELISE
Saturday, today, we will have a
family fishing trip. All of you
will board a charter boat for some
perch fishing. Tomorrow, the
morning will be free for those of
you who attend church services.
After lunch, we are headed over to
the campground for two days of
camping and engage in such
activities as baseball, canoeing,
arts and crafts, horseback riding,
swimming, archery, and hiking. We
will return here Tuesday morning.
JON
Glad I brought the trailer.
CRAIG
You can bring the trailer for the
wives, but the four men will share
a tent. He wanted you men to be
close.
Groans from the men. The kids are all excited about doing all
these things, the adults, not so excited.
JON
Sounds like summer camp.
CRAIG
We need you to pack lunches,
beverages and snacks for the
fishing trip.
EXT CABINS – MORNING
Craig, Elise, Tanya and the entire Wertz clan are gathered
outside the cabins. Johnny is wearing a LeBron James jersey.
Jon is wearing fishing clothes and has his own fishing gear
including a tackle box the size of a suitcase. Johnny comes
up to him.
JOHNNY
What is that thing?
JON
A tackle box.
Johnny shakes his head at the size of it. He looks at all the
patches on Jon's shirt.
JOHNNY
These all for fishing stuff?
JON
Yep.
JOHNNY
They pay you to wear it? For
advertising their stuff? Or does it
help you catch more fish?
JON
No, I like the looks of it.
Jon looks at Johnny's jersey.
JON (CONT'D)
LeBron pay you to wear his name?
Does it make you a better
basketball player?
Johnny looks at his jersey and begins to open his mouth when
a small bus pulls up. The door opens and they all pile into
the bus. The driver smiles at all of them.
INT BUS – MORNING
The kids are all in the back of the bus goofing around. The
adults are in the front and silent. Uncomfortable silence.
Finally Craig breaks the silence.
CRAIG
Does anyone need Dramamine?
He holds out a bottle. The men look around. No hands. The
wives look at them.
ON JUAN
Gabby nudges Juan and whispers to him.
GABBY
Why don't you take some? You know
you get sea-sick.
JUAN
I'll be okay.
ON HWAN
Lani nudges Hwan and whispers to him.
LANI
Did you eat something?
HWAN
I'll be okay.
ON JON
Beth nudges Jon and whispers to him.
LANI
You taking some?
Jon shakes his head.
ON JOHNNY
Jacki looks at Johnny with a raised eyebrow. He shakes his
head.
ON CRAIG
CRAIG
And to make things interesting, the
largest fish caught will win a
prize.
ON JON
Jon nudges Beth and whispers.
JON
Oh, yea, I'm going to win this one.
A smug smile comes across his face.
EXT BUS – DAY
The entire party is waiting in line to board the fishing
boat. Tanya isn't looking forward to this trip. Elise has on
a fishing hat and carrying her own pole.
TANYA
(to Craig)
How long is this going to last?
CRAIG
Suppose to be three hours.
TANYA
Just like the SS Minnow.
Probably end like it too, with my
luck.
ON BOAT
The captain comes from the enclosed cabin. He is old,
disheveled and possibly drunk. He opens the door to the boat
and ushers the group on the boat.
CAPTIAN GARY
(slightly slurring)
Welcome to the Port Austin
Princess. This forty-four foot
vessel has an enclosed cabin, head,
restroom to you landlubbers and
shaded deck.
(pause)
Rods, reels ,tackles, bait, license
are included and refreshments are
available. Life jackets are on all
the walls and it is suggested that
the children put them on before
leaving the dock.
Each member of the group smiles and nods as they pass him.
EXT BOAT – DAY
The boat is headed out to the fishing grounds. The kids are
having fun, running around playing. The men all sit in
chairs, none of the men look like they are feeling well.
EXT BOAT – LATER
The boat is now drifting and everyone is fishing. It is calm
and the guys are feeling better. Each is watching the others,
eyeing their catches. Juan pulls in a nice perch. He smiles
at the other guys. Jon's pole bends, he's got one.
JON
Got one!
He reels in a four-inch perch. The other guys laugh at him.
JOHNNY
That shirt's really working for
you.
Jon glares at Johnny.
EXT BOAT – DAY - ON KIDS
Two of the boys, BUD and OMAR are eating some goodies. Bud
had Oreos, and Omar has gummy worms.
OMAR
Wanna trade?
BUD
Sure.
They happily eat their shared goodies.
ON JOHNNY
Johnny is leaning over the rail holding his fishing pole. He
feels a tug and jerks his pole. Tommie looks over.
TOMMIE
Got one, Dad?
JOHNNY
Think so.
Johnny reels in the line. Nothing there but a bare hook.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
Damn, they got my bait.
Johnny sets his pole down and looks around for some bait. Bud
and Omar walk up to see what's up.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
Hey, you guys know where he keeps
the worms?
Bud and Omar smile at each other and open their mouths to
show Johnny gummy worms that are mixed with a crushed Oreo.
It really looks like a worm and dirt. Johnny starts gagging
and leans over the rail.
EXT BOAT – LATER
Craig and Tanya are standing there fishing, if you can call
what Tanya is doing fishing. She's reading a romance novel
while her pole sits unattended. Elise stands there
concentrating on her line. Elise starts reeling and pulls in
a nice perch. He looks over at Tanya.
CRAIG
That's a good one.
He admires the fish and how quickly Elise unhooks the fish
and puts it in her bucket.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
Tanya, you watching your line?
TANYA
(not looking up)
I don't have to, there's no bait on
it.
Craig sighs and goes back to fishing.
EXT BOAT – LATER
The camera walks around the boat, watching the families
having fun, catching fish. The men still don't socialize with
each other, just their families. The captain comes out.
CAPTAIN
May I have your attention please?
Everyone stops and looks at him.
CAPTAIN (CONT'D)
The weather service has issued a
small craft advisory. Seems that
those clouds ahead are packing a
punch. Waves are going to become
two to four feet. Should we
continue fishing or head back in?
The guys all answer in unison.
GUYS
Go back in.
EXT BOAT – LATER
The boat is going back in and the waves have kicked up. The
men are all sea-sick, doubled over or leaning over the rail.
The kids are all having fun running around the deck, it's
like a roller coaster.
EXT DOCK – LATER
The guys all stumble off the boat, all sick to their
stomachs. The rest of the families follow.
ON CRAIG
Craig has his hands behind his back, hiding something.
CRAIG
We have a winner of the fishing
contest. Omar, please come get your
prize.
All smiles, Omar walks up to Craig. Craig presents him with
his prize, a nice new rod and reel. Omar is pleased as the
group claps.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
How did you catch it?
Omar thinks a moment and reaches in his pocket.
OMAR
(pulling out a gummie
worm)
Gummie worms!
The group all laughs, the men laughing the best they can,
trying not to heave.
EXT CABINS – LATER
The bus pulls in and the group comes off the bus. The men are
obviously sick and headed to bed. Craig comes off the bus.
CRAIG
We will be cooking up the perch we
caught for dinner in a little
while.
The guys groan.
EXT BEACH - DAY
The wives are all comparing notes on their husbands on the
beach as all the kids play in the water.
LANI
Hwan makes this funny little sound
when he's snoring. Like a he-he-he
he.
The other woman laugh.
GABBY
Juan too.
BETH
Do they admit it when they are
wrong?
They laugh.
JACKI
Johnny could be speeding the wrong
way on a one-way street and he
would come up with a reason he was
right.
LANI
Hwan once said a calculator was
wrong.
More laughter.
BETH
Jon questions every bill, no matter
how small.
GABBY
Juan does too, but he's a chef so
he knows what the servers go
through.
JACKI
Does he cook for you at home?
GABBY
Of course not. If the reviewers
only knew. What do your guy's do?
BETH
Jon teaches literature at a small
college.
JACKI
We own a plumbing store but we have
thirty-year-old toilets in our
home.
They laugh.
BETH
What does Hwan do, Lani?
Lani doesn't like talk about their money.
LANI
He's a designer.
JACKI
What does he design?
LANI
(evasive)
Clothing, some furniture.
They can tell something is up.
GABBY
Come on, out with it.
LANI
Have you heard of Hwan-Lan clothing
line?
JACKI
You are the Lan from Hwan-Lan?
Lani is a little embarrassed.
GABBY
We do get a family discount now,
don't we?
The girls all share a laugh.
EXT JOHNNYS CABIN – DAY
Juan is walking past Johnny's cabin to go down to the beach.
He hears a sound coming from the bedroom window. It's the
sounds of a golf tournament. He inches closer. Close on Juan.
JON (O.S.)
(whispering in his ear)
What are you doing?
Jon scares the shit out of Juan.
JUAN
What the hell are you doing, man?
JON
Eavesdropping on your
eavesdropping.
JUAN
I wasn't eavesdropping, I was
listening to golf.
Jon is pleasantly surprised. There is a roar from the
television. They both edge closer to the window to hear the
action.
HWAN (O.S.)
Hey!
They turn around to see Hwan looking at them.
JON
It's not what it looks like.
JUAN
It's golf.
Hwan understands and quietly joins them at the window.
HWAN
Who's winning?
INT JOHNNYS CABIN - DAY
Johnny is laying on his bed watching the golf tournament.
ANNOUNCER (O.S.)
With two hole remaining, Tiger
Woods leads Garcia and Toms by two
strokes.
JUAN (O.S.)
Damn!
Johnny turns to the window to see the other three men
watching.
EXT BEACH - DAY
The women continue their conversations.
JACKI
And that damn golf --
LANI
Guess who brought his putter on our
honeymoon and practiced on our
wedding night?
JACKI
I have a sand trap in the back
yard. Neighborhood cats think it's
the community toilet.
BETH
We had our kids around the major
golf tournaments.
GABBY
I had to threaten to leave Juan
when he tried to name our son
Sergio Garcia Wertz.
Lani looks around.
LANI
Where are they, anyway?
BETH
Probably asleep.
GABBY
I'd say Juan is watching golf, but
no TV's.
Jacki know exactly what Johnny is doing. She gets up.
JACKI
Follow me.
They all get up and follow Jacki.
EXT JOHNNYS CABIN - DAY
The girls are gathered outside Johnny and Jacki's cabin
listening to the guys inside watching golf.
JON (O.S.)
How could he miss that?
JUAN (O.S.)
Just a dead pull.
The girls snicker.
GABBY
(loudly)
Hey, what kind of pulling is going
on in there?
INT JOHNNY'S CABIN - DAY
The guys are all caught by surprise, kids caught with their
hands in the cookie jar.
JOHNNY
We just…
The girls all give knowing looks.
INT JOHNNYS CABIN - MORNING
Johnny is looking in his luggage as he and Jacki get ready
for church.
JOHNNY
Have you seen my tie?
JACKI
No, I didn't pack for you
Tommie and Mario walk into the room wearing their matching
Wertz shirts.
TOMMIE
Can Mario come to church with us?
JOHNNY
Sure, he can come.
Candy walks in at the same time. She's wearing the shirt
also.
CANDY
If Mario gets to go I want to bring
Meika and Melinda.
JOHNNY
I don't have room for them all,
baby.
MELINDA
You can take my dads truck, he
won't mind. We can all sit in the
back.
JOHNNY
I'm sure he would mind....
He can't remember her name.
MELINDA
It's Melinda, Uncle Johnny.
He is surprised by the uncle part.
JOHNNY
I knew that.
EXT CABIN PARKING LOT - MORNING
Jon is handing Johnny the keys to the truck as the kids pile
into the back.
JON
It's got gas and the registration
and proof of insurance is in the
glovebox.
The kids finally are all in the back. Johnny goes to the back
of the truck and peeks inside.
JOHNNY
This all of you?
All the little heads nod yes.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
You sure you didn't bring a few
neighbor kids?
They giggle.
MEIKA
Uncle Johnny, you're so funny.
He half smiles at her and turns away.
EXT CHURCH - DAY
The big truck pulls into the parking lot. Johnny spies an
empty spot and tries to pull into the spot. The spot is a
little tight and he has trouble getting the truck in
straight. The truck is too big. With some difficulty, he
backs out of the spot and tries another spot. Same problems.
Exasperated, he moves the truck to the back of the lot which
is empty. The kids pile out of the truck and they all walk up
to the church entrance where some of the other churchgoers
notice them. Johnny looks around at the faces looking at
them.
JOHNNY
(to Jacki)
Why are they all looking at us?
JACKI
Could be because we have ten kids
of every race following us into
church.
TOMMIE
Or because you almost hit about
five cars.
Johnny takes offense.
JOHNNY
They weren't even close. I was in
total control.
They get to the church enterence doors where they are greeted
by Father Tom, who is, holding the door.
JACKI
Good Morning Father
FATHER TOM
Good morning, to you, and a fine
looking family you arrive with this
morning.
The kids all smile as they walk through the door, saying
hello. Finally a tired looking Johnny comes through the door.
JOHNNY
'Morning Father.
FATHER TOM
It's a brave and righteous man who
comes to church on a vacation
Sunday, especially with that many
children.
JOHNNY
They're not all mine, some old guy
died and...
Father Tom looks at him quizzically.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
Never mind.
FATHER TOM
We are all one family in God's
eyes, my son.
Johnny stops for a moment then walks off as the organ starts.
EXT CABINS - DAY
Craig and Elise are putting the camping equipment into the
bus. Tanya is next to the bus sitting in a chair reading a
trashy novel. Craig walks off the bus. Tanya looks up at him.
TANYA
Do you need any help?
CRAIG
No, that's okay. We are almost
done.
Elise comes out of the bus, excited at the thought of
camping.
ELISE
This is going to be so much fun.
Are the marshmallows packed? Can't
go camping without roasting them
over the fire, can we?
Tanya looks up annoyed.
TANYA
I hate marshmallows.
Some of the kids come running up the bus, yelling and
generally making kid's noise. Tanya looks at them with
contempt.
TANYA (CONT'D)
Do they have to make so much noise?
Hwan and Lani walk up to the bus carrying their stuff.
CRAIG
All set?
HWAN
I think so, only two nights right?
CRAIG
Just two, but we have lots of
activities planned for you guys.
The time will go by quickly.
They board the bus as Johnny and Jacki walk up to the bus
carrying their stuff. Johnny reaches over for Jacki's bag.
She pulls away.
JOHNNY
I was going to put it on the bus.
JACKI
My stuff isn't going on the bus.
Beth invited all us girls to stay
in their trailer.
Johnny is surprised.
JOHNNY
You get to stay in that big trailer
and we have to stay in a tent? How
does that happen?
JACKI
I don't know and I don't care. I
get a bed and a mattress.
With that said she walks off to the trailer.
JOHNNY
(to Craig)
How many tents do we have?
CRAIG
Two. One for the kids and one for
the men.
JOHNNY
Us guys have to share a tent?
CRAIG
That's what the instructions said.
JOHNNY
The instructions don't know about
my bad back.
Johnny is still mumbling something unintelligible as he
climbs on the bus as Juan and Gabby approach the bus. Juan
doesn't look happy. They board the bus.
INT BUS – DAY
All of the people are aboard the bus. The kids are excited
about camping, while the adults, especially the men look less
than thrilled. Craig stands in the isle and speaks to them.
CRAIG
The activities we have planned
include games, baseball, canoeing,
arts and crafts, horseback riding,
swimming, archery, and hiking.
The kids cheer.
HWAN
Why so much?
JUAN
Can't we relax a little?
CRAIG
We are trying to cram a childhood
into two days. Not much time for
relaxation.
JOHNNY
What about the bathroom?
CRAIG
There is a Port-a-potty at the
site.
GABBY
Yuck. We have to use an outside
bathroom?
CRAIG
Not the ladies. Jon and Beth have
generously offered the use of their
RV bathroom.
The guys all look bummed.
EXT CAMP GROUND - DAY
The bus stops at a small campground. Jon's truck pulls up on
front of a full RV hook-up with electricity, water and sewer.
They all get out of the bus and truck and start unloading
their gear.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
The guys are looking at the tent laid out on the ground.
There are quite a few parts.
JUAN
Think we should we find the
directions?
JON
It's just a tent.
JOHNNY
Can't be that hard.
HWAN
Looks complicated for a tent.
Each of the guys start grabbing parts. The kids stand and
watch for a moment.
TOMMIE
Dad, can we put up our tent?
The men all look over and smile at the kids.
JOHNNY
Sure, go ahead. Have a ball, kids.
The men all chuckle at the thought of the kids trying to put
it up tent by themselves. The kids open the tent box and
start reading the directions.
INT TRAILER - DAY
The girls are sitting in the trailer having wine watching the
guys.
LANI
This camping stuff is hard.
Beth comes over from the counter carrying a plate with cheese
and crackers.
BETH
It's tough. Some cheese and
crackers?
The girls grab some.
JACKI
Thank you.
LANI
Thank you, wonderful wine.
GABBY
How long until the tents are up?
LANI
Not looking good. Looks like they
are fighting about it.
The guys are having a hard time. Too many egos involved in
the process.
JACKI
The kids?
LANI
No, the husbands.
BETH
This should be better than
television.
She sits and watches.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
The guys are trying to put up their tent. Juan is in the
partially erected tent.
JUAN
Hand me the other pole.
HWAN
It goes on the outside, not inside.
JUAN
I'm telling you that it goes in
here.
Juan puts the pole in place and stands back to look at his
handiwork.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
Craig and Elise are putting up their tent. As usual, Tanya
isn't helping, just reading her novel.
TANYA
I thought Elise would be able to
put up her tent by herself.
CRAIG
We are all sharing this tent.
Tanya doesn't like this at all.
TANYA
Why can't I sleep in the trailer?
CRAIG
Were you invited?
TANYA
No.
CRAIG
I think it's just the sister-in
laws.
TANYA
They aren't sister-in-laws, just
some unfortunate people brought
together by a crazy old man's
stupid idea.
Elise walks out of the tent.
ELISE
I think it's neat. He wanted all
his sons to be together for a
little bit.
Tanya rolls her eyes.
TANYA
Look at them, they aren't related.
Anyone with eyes can see they
aren't. This whole thing is
completely idiotic.
Craig and Elise look a each other.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
The guys are looking at the tent which is obviously not put
up correctly. They are tired from their ordeal and are
enjoying cold beers.
JUAN
Not bad.
HWAN
No, it will be fine.
JOHNNY
Better than the directions anyway.
Look how the roof slopes. It will
be better if it rains.
They admire the tent. A kid's voice calls to them.
TOMMIE (O.S.)
How did we do?
The men all look over to the kid's tent. They are all
standing in front of the tent that is perfectly erected. The
kids smile triumphantly.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
Juan and Hwan are putting their sleeping bags and belongings
into their tent. They are bumping into each other and it's
obvious that they are going to be cramped. Johnny comes to
the tent door.
JOHNNY
I need to be near the door.
Claustrophobia.
Hwan looks at him skeptically.
HWAN
Yea, me too.
Juan smiles.
JUAN
Same here.
JOHNNY
Okay, it's beans for dinner tonight
then.
Juan and Hwan don't like the sounds of this.
HWAN
You can have the door.
Johnny smiles and Jon walks up to the door of the tent
carrying his sleeping bag.
JON
Anyone mind if I get to be by the
door?
They all look at him.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
Juan is finishing cooking the burgers and hot dogs over the
campfire. A big pot of beans simmers. He announces it to the
campsite.
JUAN
Dinner's ready.
Everyone rushes up for their meal, Tanya is first. She looks
over the hamburgers and hot dogs.
TANYA
No chicken? No fish?
Juan looks at her.
JUAN
Sorry, not on the menu tonight.
Tanya takes a burger and leaves, unhappy.
EXT CAMP GROUND – DAY
Johnny comes out of the port-a-potty and notices the line for
dinner. He is distressed. He walks to the end of the line. He
sees Tommie and Candy up ahead. He walks up to them and
whispers to them.
JOHNNY
Don't get the hamburgers. You know
I hate hot dogs. I can't eat them.
They both nod. Johnny walks to the back of the line. The line
is going quick and soon Johnny is at the front. He looks down
and sees only hot dogs left. Juan tries to give him a hot
dog.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
No more burgers?
Juan shakes his head no.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
I hate hot dogs, just give me some
beans.
JUAN
No beans. Remember?
Exasperated, Johnny takes his hot dog and steams off to the
condiment table where he douses his dog with mustard,
ketchup, onions and anything else available and grabs a
handful of chips. He walks to the table where his family is
happily eating.
JACKI
What's this? You hate hot dogs.
Johnny just gives her a dirty look and unhappily chomps on
his hot dog.
EXT CAMPING - EVENING
The sun is setting and the families are sitting around the
fire, relaxing.
HWAN
This is relaxing.
JUAN
We don't do this enough.
Smiles all around. Craig comes out if his tent carrying a
board game.
CRAIG
Time to start the activities.
He holds up Monopoly. The men grown, playing a board game is
the last thing they want to do.
EXT CAMPING - EVENING
The men are seated around a picnic table and playing a heated
game of Monopoly.
The kids are roasting marshmallows and the women are doing
their best to ignore the guys who are drinking and getting
loud.
EXT CAMPING – EVENING – CARD TABLE
Juan rolls the dice and tosses them. He moves his piece and…
HWAN
(happily)
St. Charles place with a hotel. You
owe me…
He picks up the card.
HWAN (CONT'D)
…$750
JUAN
(pissed)
Damn, I'm busted.
JON
I'll give you a thousand for your
railroads
HWAN
(defensive to Jon)
You can't do that.
JON
Why not?
JOHNNY
Yea, why not?
HWAN
(defensive to Jon)
You just can't.
Juan hands the cards to Jon and takes the thousand dollars he
was offering.
JUAN
Too bad. Call the S.E.C. Who's turn
is it?
Johnny takes the dice and starts shaking.
EXT CAMPING – NIGHT
The kids are being tucked into their tent as Craig, Tanya and
Elise walk to their tent.
They all climb in and get their sleeping clothes. They look
at each other. This isn't going to work.
ELISE
I'll go change behind the tent.
EXT CAMPING – LATE NIGHT - TABLE
The guys are still playing Monopoly as the fire slowly dies.
They slap at mosquitoes.
JOHNNY
The fire needs more wood. Let's
roll for it.
Johnny picks the die and rolls. Five.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
Five.
Hwan picks up the die and tosses it. Two.
HWAN
Damn.
Juan picks up the die and tosses it. Six.
JUAN
Yes!
A woman's voice comes from the trailer.
VOICE
Keep it down, we are trying to
sleep.
The guys all look sheepishly to the trailer. Jon picks up the
die and tosses it. Five.
JON
That's you Hwan, and please grab me
a beer while you're up.
Hwan gets up.
JUAN
I need one too.
JOHNNY
Same here.
EXT CAMPING – VERY LATE NIGHT - TABLE
They slap at mosquitoes and are still playing Monopoly. The
fire has died and the guys are pretty drunk and very tired.
JOHNNY
I need to sleep. Let's call it a
draw.
JON
No way, I'm winning.
JUAN
I need the bathroom.
Juan rises from his seat and knocks the table to the ground,
scattering the money, cards and pieces. They look at Juan.
JON
You did that on purpose.
Juan shakes his head.
JUAN
I did it because I need to use the
bathroom.
Johnny gets up.
JOHNNY
Forget this, I'm going to bed.
He wanders over to the tent as the others head for the port-a
potty. Johnny hangs a lamp from a pole and climbs into his
sleeping back and gets settled.
A moment later, he is interrupted by Juan getting into the
tent. Juan gets into his sleeping bag and settled when Jon
enters the tent.
It's getting crowded in there as Jon settles in.
Hwan peeks into the almost-full tent. He steps over one man,
then another, then another until he reaches his small
sleeping space. He wiggles into his bag, disrupting his tent
mates. Johnny reaches up and zips the tent flap.
JUAN
Anyone going to hit that light?
JON
(to Juan)
You're the closest.
JUAN
And I'm trapped here like a damn
sardine.
JOHNNY
I was wondering what that smell
was.
Hwan gets up and turns off the light. Its pitch black in the
tent. Someone cuts a loud, juicy fart.
JUAN
Damn, I saw the tent walls ripple.
The odor drifts through the tent.
HWAN
That is extremely offensive.
JOHNNY
Can everyone please be quiet so I
can sleep?
JON
Stop doing that and we can sleep.
It happens again. A huge burst of nasty flatulence. The guys
groan.
HWAN
Johnny, can you please open the
flap so we can get some fresh air
in here?
JOHNNY
And let all those mosquitoes in
here?
JUAN
What are you worried about, the
smell's gonna kill them anyway.
Johnny reaches up and unzips the door. Fresh air fills the
tent. Relief.
ALL
Ahhhh.
INT CRAIGS TENT - MORNING
Craig, Tanya and Elise are all asleep in the small tent.
Craig is asleep and has his arm around Elise. Her eyes open
wide as his hand starts moving upward toward her breast.
She locks her arms to her side, stopping his hand from
reaching its target. Craig mumbles something unintelligible.
CRAIG
Wha..hum..bub..
And then he starts to pull her closer. Elise is very
uncomfortable in this position. Elise tries to move away but
Craig holds her tighter. Tanya wakes up and turns over to see
Craig's arm on Elise and is pissed off. She shoves Craig who
wakens with a start.
TANYA
What the hell is going on?
Craig looks over at his arm on Elise, who sits up a little.
Craig quickly removes his arm and looks at Tanya.
CRAIG
I was asleep; I must have thought
it was you.
Tanya eyes Elise suspiciously.
TANYA
I find that hard to believe.
Elise gets up, wearing only tiny shorts and tank top.
ELISE
I think I'll go for a long run.
Tanya and Craig watch her as she looks for her shoes and
leaves the tent. They look at each other before the fireworks
start.
EXT CAMPING - MORNING
The women exit the trailer and inspect the damage from last
night. The table is overturned and the Monopoly game is all
over the ground as well as about a case of empty beer cans.
JACKI
What the hell happened?
GABBY
Did they have a fight?
BETH
I didn't hear anything.
The kids come out of their tent. They see the overturned
table and mess too.
BUD
Were there bears here?
LANI
Yep, four of them.
BUD
Where are they now?
BETH
Asleep in the tent. Bud you need to
go in there and wake daddy up.
GABBY
Omar, Mario, you guys go help Bud.
The boys slowly go over to the tent. They get closer. The
odor is almost overpowering.
BUD
Mom, it stinks in there.
BETH
I'll bet it does. Boys, grab the
pole and run over here.
The boys grab the pole holding the front of the tent up and
pull it away, collapsing the tent on the men.
MEN
Hey! What's going on? What are you
doing?
The hung-over men emerge from their collapsed tent. All of
their faces are covered with large mosquito bites.
EXT CAMPING - MORNING
The men are all seated at tables nursing hangovers and
wearing lotion on their mosquito bites. Craig comes over with
a pile of link sausage and sets it in front of them.
CRAIG
Eat up guys, lots to do today.
Groans from all of them. Elise comes back from her run and up
to Craig.
ELISE
Everything okay?
CRAIG
Depends on your definition of okay.
ELISE
Is she still mad?
CRAIG
I'm not sure, she left fifteen
minutes ago. Jon took her to the
cabin.
ELISE
She going to be there when we get
back?
CRAIG
I have no idea. Probably not.
ELISE
I'm sorry.
CRAIG
Not your fault, don't worry about
it and I'm sorry for what happened.
ELISE
Wasn't intentional. No problem.
CRAIG
Thanks. Breakfast?
He offers sausage. She smiles at him.
ELISE
Love some.
She takes a sausage and walks away.
EXT CAMPING - MORNING
The women watch the men waiting in line to use the port-a
potty.
BETH
I feel bad. Should we let them?
JACKI
I wouldn't if you value you holding
tanks.
The other women nod in agreement. Craig comes up to them.
CRAIG
The bus is on its way to pick us
up. Are all of you ready for
canoeing?
LANI
We are. I'm not too sure about
them.
She points to the guys who would give anything to be back in
bed sleeping.
EXT CANOE RENTAL - DAY
They are all gathered at the small canoe rental. The lazy
river runs in front of them. Craig speaks to them.
CRAIG
You all have your canoe
assignments. To make it
interesting, the first ones to make
it to the pick-up spot each get
twenty five dollar gift
certificates to the stores in Port
Austin.
The kids cheer.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
The bus will be there to pick us up
in three hours. Let's get going.
They all move toward their canoes.
EXT CANOE RENTAL - DAY
The four men are all climbing in their canoe. They have a
little trouble keeping it balanced in the water. Johnny grabs
the canoe and steadies it. Hwan climbs in.
HWAN
We shouldn't all be in the same
canoe. These things have to have
weight limitations.
JOHNNY
It's all weight displacement. We
will be fine.
Jon climbs into the canoe.
JON
I'm going to be sick.
Juan climbs in, then Johnny.
JUAN
Do it in the river.
EXT CANOE RENTAL - DAY
Craig, Elise and a couple smaller kids are in one canoe. The
bigger kids are in their own canoe. The wives are together in
another. The four canoes slowly glide down the river.
EXT RIVER - DAY
MONTAGE
Gliding down the river, kids splashing the men, Craig and
Elise having fun, the women staying out of the way.
EXT RIVER - DAY
The pick-up spot is within sight and the older kids are
racing their dads for the prize. The dads get ahead and all
stand up and turn around taunting the kids. Their canoe hits
a partially submerged log and they get tossed into the water.
The kids cheer as they pull up to the dock.
EXT RIDING STABLE - DAY
The whole clan is at a riding stable. The men are soaked from
their spill in the water. They are looking at the horses in
the stable.
HWAN
I've never been on one and not
looking to start.
JON
It's a piece of cake, you'll be
fine.
JOHNNY
These things are huge.
JON
They are very gentle animals.
A horse walks over and Jon starts to pet him. Johnny moves
his hand near the horse. It whinnies, scaring the hell out of
Johnny.
EXT HORSEBACK RIDING - DAY
They are all riding their horses along the trail. All except
Juan, whose horse won't budge. He is frustrated.
JUAN
Come on, let's go.
The horse won't budge.
BASKETBALL – DAY
The guys are shooting baskets, about to start playing PIG,
the game where you have to make a shot if the man ahead of
you makes the shot. If he makes it and you miss, you get a
letter. Once you get P-I-G, you are out of the game. Their
families are watching them. Craig has an announcement.
CRAIG
The winner of this game gets a
twenty-five dollar gift certificate
to the stores in Port Austin. I
drew names and Jon starts, followed
by Juan, Hwan and Johnny.
Jon is dribbling the ball.
JON
You guys ready?
JOHNNY
Let's go. This is my game.
Jon dribbles near the foul line and puts up a jumper. All
net. It's clear that he's played before and is quite good.
Juan takes the ball and sets himself at the foul line and
shoots. He misses.
OMAR
You got a P, Daddy.
The crowd laughs. Johnny takes the ball and makes a jumper
from the side. Hwan takes the ball. He doesn't dribble very
well.
HWAN
I have to make that shot?
JUAN
No, you don't have to. We would
like it if you missed.
More laughs as Hwan walks over to the spot where Johnny made
his shot. Hwan looks at the basket and shoots the shot
underhand, ala Rick Berry. It goes in. Meika cheers.
JOHNNY
You got a P.
Hwan looks at him.
HWAN
But I made the shot from the same
spot.
JUAN
Have to shoot it like the guy who
made it. Overhand, underhand, one
handed, whatever.
Hwan thinks for a moment.
HWAN
Okay, got it.
Montage of the guys shooting and making and missing, trying
to intimidate each other. Hwan shooting underhand, making the
others miss. Juan's out. The other three play on. Jon's out.
Hwan and Johnny playing. Hwan still shooting underhand, never
missing, but Johnny doesn't miss either. Hwan misses a shot.
Johnny has a little confidence. He takes a hook shot. All
net. His kids cheer.
JOHNNY
Whoooo!!! Make that one, clothing
man.
Hwan takes the ball and walks toward the spot. He studies the
angle and takes a couple practice moves with his arm. Finally
he takes the ball and shoots the awkward hook shot. It hits
the top of the rim and bounces in slo-motion once, twice.
All eyes are on the ball.
The ball bounces a third time before falling in the basket.
Johnny is bummed out, he thought he had won. He takes the
ball and takes a long jumper from the top of the key. No
good. Hwan takes the ball.
HWAN
I can shoot from anywhere?
JOHNNY
(confidently)
Anywhere you want.
Hwan takes the ball and goes behind the basket. He looks over
the basket at the angle. He takes his shooting position and
shoots the ball over the basket at the perfect angle. Swish.
Johnny is crushed, but tries not to show it. He gathers the
ball and walks to the spot where Hwan made the shot.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
(to himself)
Easy shot, easy shot.
Johnny takes a deep breath and lofts the shot. The ball arcs
over the top of the basket, toward the rim. Slow-motion on
the ball as it misses the rim completely. Johnny just looks
at the basket.
JON
How's that jersey working for you,
LeBron?
A dirty look from Johnny.
INT BUS – DAY
They are all on the bus, headed for the beach. Johnny is
brooding silently. Jacki notices his mood.
JACKI
It's just a game.
He doesn't want to listen to that and shifts away, looking
out the window. Craig stands up and addresses the group.
CRAIG
At the beach, we will have a family
event, a sand castle building
contest.
The kids all cheer.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
Each family will have thirty
minutes to build the best
sandcastle. The winners will each
receive a twenty-five dollar gift
certificate.
The kids cheer again.
EXT BEACH - DAY
Montage - Each family is building their sand castle. Some are
large, some intricate. Some dry out and fall apart.
EXT BEACH - DAY
Montage – Craig and Elise are judging each sandcastle. Giving
the prizes to Jon's family.
EXT CAMPING - EVENING
The tired group gets off the bus. They all flop into the
chairs, tired from the busy day.
CRAIG
Anyone up for cooking?
JON
How about beer and sleep?
JOHNNY
Sounds good to me.
Craig looks over to the incoming vehicle. It's a man
delivering pizzas.
CRAIG
Pizza sound good to everyone?
The kids all cheer. Smiles on the adults.
EXT CAMPING – EVENING
Montague of the families all eating pizza, tired but almost
happy.
EXT CAMPING - NIGHT
The four men are all asleep sitting in chairs around the
campfire. The women watch them from a nearby table.
JACKI
They are sure quiet while they are
sleeping.
One of the men passes gas.
LANI
(as she gets up)
I knew that couldn't last.
The rest of the women follow her lead and walk to the
trailer.
EXT CAMPING - MORNING
The men all emerge sore and tired from their tent. The women
and kids are all eating breakfast.
JACKI
You guys almost missed breakfast.
BETH
Sleep well?
ALL
No.
They sit at their tables, wishing they were in their own
beds.
ARCHERY RANGE - DAY
Montage of the families shooting arrows into targets.
- The adults get real ones, the kids, rubber suction cup
ones.
- An arrow gets accidentally shot up in the air and comes
down with a seagull impaled on it.
- Jon turns around with a suction-cupped arrow stuck to his
forehead.
EXT BASEBALL DIAMOND - DAY
Montage of the families having fun playing baseball.
- Juan striking out.
- Bud running the wrong way around the bases.
- Elise hitting a ball past the outfielders and an impressed
Craig
INT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
They all walk into the miniature golf park.
JON
Now, this is my game.
Johnny looks at him.
JOHNNY
You think so?
JON
Drive for show, putt for dough.
JOHNNY
Care to put some money on it?
JON
Twenty?
HWAN
I want in.
JUAN
I'll take a piece of that.
The men wander over to the cashier to pay for their rounds.
GABBY
This is going to get ugly.
The other women nod in agreement.
EXT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
The men are all playing together on the first hole. Juan is
plumb-bobbing his short putt.
JOHNNY
It's only a foot, what are you
doing that for?
HWAN
Just putt.
Juan misses the putt and almost throws his club.
EXT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
The men are playing the third hole. Johnny is getting ready
to putt.
JUAN
Johnny, do you breathe in or out
when you putt.
Johnny loses his concentration and miss-hits his putt,
sending the ball away from the intended line.
EXT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
The men are playing the sixth hole. Jon is getting ready to
putt. We can see a shadow moving back and forth over his
ball. He looks up and sees Hwan moving, causing the shadow
distraction.
JON
Hwan, you need to use the bathroom?
HWAN
No, why?
JON
Because you're dancing around like
a three-year-old with a full
bladder.
INT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
The men are all gathered around the pimply-faced assistant
manager, who stares at them incredulously.
MANAGER
You want me to decide if it's a
stroke and distance penalty if the
ball leaves the putting surface?
The men all nod.
MANAGER (CONT'D)
I'm only sixteen.
EXT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
Montage of the guys putting, missing and making putts and
their wives watching them.
EXT MINIATURE GOLF - DAY
They all are walking out of the miniature golf park. Hwan is
counting his money.
HWAN
Nice doing business with all of
you.
The other guys grumble.
EXT NATURE TRAIL - DAY
The families are walking on a trail through the woods. An
attractive young guide, KAREN, points out trees, birds and
animals.
KAREN
There is a robin the Michigan state
bird.
They walk a bit further. Karen bends down and picks up a
toad.
KAREN (CONT'D)
This area is full of toads. You
have to be careful not to step on
them.
LANI
Are there any snakes here?
KAREN
There are quite a few species of
snakes; garter snakes, rat snakes,
various watersnakes.
BETH
Any of them poisonous?
KAREN
Just one, the massasauga rattler.
This bit of news puts them all on notice.
KAREN (CONT'D)
But they are very rare and very
shy, so don't be alarmed.
They all walk a little further to a clearing.
CRAIG
Let's take a break and have some
water.
Everyone appreciates the break and sits to drink. The kids
all continue to explore the woods.
JOHNNY
I'll be glad when this weekend is
over. Too much work for me.
BETH
We are leaving here to go do some
camping.
LANI
I'm not use to this. We don't do
this type of thing for vacation. I
prefer hotel pools and room
service, but this is fun.
Just then, Omar and Tommie come out of the woods holding a
snake.
OMAR
Look what we caught!!
They walk over to the group holding the small snake.
BETH
What kind is it?
The snake makes a small rattle.
GABBY
Drop it, it's a rattle-one!!!
The boys immediately throw the snake toward the woods, where
Mieka is walking to the group. She reacts to the object being
thrown at her and reaches out to block the flying snake. The
snake hits her hand and falls to the ground. She looks down
and reaches for it. The adults see her.
ALL
DON'T!!
Too late, the frightened snake bites her finger.
INT HOSPITAL - DAY
The entire group is in the hospital waiting room except for
Hwan, Lani and Meika. Hwan comes out of the emergency room.
Everyone looks at him.
HWAN
She's going to be fine. She doesn't
even have to stay the night.
GABBY
Thank god.
She crosses herself.
HWAN
You all go back to the cabins; we
can take a cab back when she's
released.
JACKI
We can stay.
GABBY
It's no problem.
Lani and a shaken Meika walk out behind Hwan.
LANI
She's officially released.
A small smile from Meika.
BETH
How are you feeling, honey?
MEIKA
Better. Still a little scared.
LANI
I don't think we will be going
camping any time soon.
EXT CABINS - EVENING
The bus drops all of them off at the cabins. They are all
tired from camping and the snake-bite ordeal. They all
separate and go back to their rooms.
INT JOHNNYS CABIN - EVENING
Johnny goes to the refrigerator to grab a beer, but there is
none left.
JOHNNY
Damn, no beer left.
JACKI
Go ask the other guys, maybe they
have one.
JOHNNY
I don't want to bother them. Maybe
I'll just go grab a beer or two at
that little bar down the road.
JACKI
Okay, going to ask if they want to
join you?
JOHNNY
I don't think so; I'd kinda like to
have a couple cold ones on my own.
He grabs his keys and kisses her.
JACKI
I understand. I love you.
JOHNNY
I love you too.
He walks out the door.
INT SMALL BAR - NIGHT
Johnny walks into the small, dark bar and sits at the bar. A
baseball game is on the television. There are a few customers
at the tables and a few at the bar talking to the bartender,
GEORGE. George is a large, serious man and is talking with a
couple of regulars. After a few moments George walks over to
him without a greeting or a smile.
JOHNNY
(big smile)
Hey, how about a Bud?
George turns to get the beer from the cooler and returns with
the beer.
GEORGE
That's three dollars.
Johnny reaches in his pocket and pulls out some money and
lays it on the beer. George takes it and walks away.
EXT JOHNNYS CABIN - EVENING
Jon and Juan come to Johnny's cabin door and knock. Jacki
comes to the door.
JACKI
Hey guys, what's up?
JUAN
Johnny here?
JACKI
No, he decided to go out and get a
beer.
JON
Where did he go?
JACKI
That little bar down toward town.
Is it important?
JUAN
No, just wanted to see if he wanted
to have a drink.
JACKI
Go have one with him there; I'm
sure he'd appreciate it.
JON
Okay, thanks.
Jon and Juan walk away.
JON (CONT'D)
We going?
JUAN
Sure. Why not? It's the last night
here. Let's see if Hwan wants to go
too.
INT SMALL BAR - NIGHT
Johnny is playing pool with one of the locals. The jukebox
plays 70's rock songs. There seems to be a bit of interest in
the game from the other patrons. He runs three…four…five
balls.
JOHNNY
Eight ball in the side.
A nice bank shot and Johnny wins the game. Townie 1 isn't
happy.
TOWNIE #1
Lucky shot.
JOHNNY
Oh yea? You want to play again? For
twenty?
Johnny laughs which makes the townie even angrier. The townie
puts quarters in the table and begins racking. He looks up at
Johnny and snarls.
TOWNIE #1
Make it fifty.
INT SMALL BAR - LATER
Johnny is watching the townie shoot. He's not bad, but misses
a long shot. Johnny only has three balls left. Johnny surveys
the table and leans over to take his shot. Just when he's
ready to shoot, another local "accidentally" bumps him.
Johnny looks up at him.
JOHNNY
You about done dancing?
TOWNIE #2
Just going to the bathroom, man.
JOHNNY
Sure you are.
Johnny leans over again and takes his shot. He makes it. Then
the next and the next. Only the eight ball remains. He smiles
to himself. A song starts on the radio, The Boys are Back in
Town, by Thin Lizzy. The townies start rocking to the tune.
TOWNIE 3
(to his friends)
Now this is some good music. Not
like that rap shit.
Johnny smiles.
JOHNNY
You boys don't like songs by the
brothers?
TOWNIE #2
Not particularly.
JOHNNY
What about Prince? Mariah Carey?
TOWNIE #2
Nope. Nope. Don't like black music.
JOHNNY
Come on, Prince has a white mother.
Doesn't that count?
TOWNIE 2
Nope, don't matter.
JOHNNY
You like this though?
TOWNIE #2
Yea, great song.
JOHNNY
Did you know that the lead singer
of this band, Thin Lizzy, was a
brother?
This is all news to them and they don't like Johnny or what
he's saying.
TOWNIE #1
Bullshit.
JOHNNY
Look it up. Phil Lynott, the lead
singer had a Brazilian father.
Johnny lines up the eight ball and makes the shot.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
And you owe me fifty dollars which
I will collect after I use the
bathroom.
Johnny walks over to the bathroom.
EXT SMALL BAR - SAME TIME
Jon, Juan and Hwan are approaching the bar in Jon's truck.
INT SMALL BAR - LATER
Johnny is returning from the bathroom. The townies are all
sitting together at a table. Johnny walks up to the table.
JOHNNY
Hey man, I'm really thirsty and I
need that fifty to quench my
thirst.
TOWNIE #1
Then go back into the bathroom and
drink some toilet water.
The townies laugh. Johnny smiles at them.
JOHNNY
I figured this would happen.
Welfare check didn't come yet?
The table goes quiet. Johnny walks over to the jukebox and
starts a song. Thin Lizzy. He smiles at the table of townies
and goes to the bar. George the bartender comes over to him.
GEORGE
Bar's closed.
Johnny looks at his watch.
JOHNNY
What are you talking about? It's
only eleven o'clock.
The townies are now gathered menacingly around Johnny. Townie
#1 gets in Johnny's face.
TOWNIE #1
It's closed for you.
Johnny waves his hand in front of his nose.
JOHNNY
Brother, you got some serious
halitosis.
Johnny starts to get up and is shoved in his seat. Johnny
pushes back and the fight is on. The four townies are
punching Johnny, who is valiantly fighting back.
ON THE DOOR
Jon, Juan and Hwan come through the door and see Johnny being
beaten up by the townies.
They rush to his aid and start pulling the men off and
fighting with them. They start kicking some townie ass. Jon
and Juan are taking care of their guys, Johnny is beating up
Townie #1 and Hwan is throwing some nasty kicks. Suddenly the
unmistakable sound of a shotgun being racked is heard.
Everyone stops to look for the sound.
ON GEORGE
George is standing there holding a double-barrel shotgun.
GEORGE
That's it boys.
EXT CABINS - NIGHT
The boys come back bloodied, but happy. They walk through the
parking lot.
JON
Hwan, where did you learn that?
JOHNNY
That was some serious ass-kicking
shit.
HWAN
Being part Asian, it's pretty much
expected that I knew some sort of
martial art. Damn Karate Kid
movies.
JUAN
Beers on the beach?
ALL
Sounds good. Yeah...
EXT BEACH - NIGHT
They are sitting there drinking beers.
JON
Did you guys ever meet him?
JOHNNY
I remember some guy there, took me
for ice cream.
JUAN
I don't remember, but I remember
some vague feeling I was being
watched sometimes.
HWAN
Me too.
JON
Angry?
JUAN
No, disappointed, but not angry.
HWAN
Same here.
JOHNNY
I did miss someone, just didn't
know who to miss.
Johnny stands and strips off his shirt.
JOHNNY (CONT'D)
I need a swim.
He starts off toward the water. The others follow his lead.
Their torn and bloody shirts are tossed into the beach.
EXT BEACH - LATER
The boys come out of the water and walk to the cabins. Elise
gets the shirts from the beach and puts them in separate
plastic bags.
GOLF COURSE - MORNING
Montage - the guys golfing, goofing around, drinking beers
and having fun. They are all wearing their Wertz shirts.
- Hwan sinking a putt and doing a karate move
- Juan buying beers from the cart girl
- Johnny helping Jon with his putting
- Hi-fives for a good shot.
BEACH - NIGHT
The families are gathered on the beach. Craig comes down with
a sealed envelope. The envelope.
CRAIG
Did everyone have fun?
Pan around to all the smiling faces. They are not sitting as
individual families, but as one family.
CRAIG (CONT'D)
I guess I better do this.
Craig opens the envelope. He reads it to himself.
JON
Read it out loud.
JOHNNY
Yeah, c'mon Craig.
Craig hesitates.
CRAIG
I'm sorry, there was a mistake. You
are not related by blood.
The camera pans all the faces.
JUAN
You mean we aren't brothers?
CRAIG
I'm afraid not.
JOHNNY
That's what I figured, some crazy
old guy.
HWAN
It was pretty easy to see, I guess.
JON
Just a guy who was lonely, I guess.
Complete silence. The guys start getting up.
CRAIG
Wait, I have something for each of
you.
Craig walks over to each of them and gives them an envelope.
They take the envelopes and slowly walk toward their cabins.
EXT CABINS - MORNING
They are all packing their vehicles. Juan walks over to Hwan.
JUAN
Hey Hwan, if business takes you to
L.A., Come look me up. I'll cook
you a great meal.
Hwan looks up at him.
HWAN
That would be great. Really great.
Johnny comes over and passes out business cards.
JOHNNY
Except for getting sea sick, the
snake and getting beat in
basketball, this was a pretty fun
time.
HWAN
And putt-putt.
JUAN
We were trying to forget about
that.
They all laugh. Jon comes over to join them.
JON
You guys ever get to Oklahoma?
More laughs.
EXT CABINS - MORNING
Craig and Elise are loading the gear into his car. He picks
up the bags with the bloody shirts.
CRAIG
What are these?
ELISE
A hunch.
A puzzled Craig looks at her.
EXT JOHNNYS HOUSE - DRIVEWAY
Johnny and Tommie are playing basketball. Tommie shoots the
ball underhand like Hwan. Johnny smiles, remembering Hwan.
INT WALMART - DAY
Juan is walking in the toy department with his boys. He walks
by a Monopoly game. He picks it up and smiles. He sets it
down and walks away. Then back to pick it up.
INT HWANS BROWNSTONE - DAY
Hwan is watching the movie The Perfect Storm. The boat is
fighting the huge waves. Hwan smiles at the memory of the
fishing trip.
INT JONS HOUSE - DAY
Back at Jon's house, he goes about his daily routine and
hears "The Boys are Back in Town" and smile remembering his
"brothers" when their song comes on.
RADIO
Guess who just got back today?
Those wild-eyed boys that had been
away, Haven't changed, haven't much
to say, But man, I still think
those cats are great…
INT JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Back at Juan's house, he hears "the boys are back in town"
and smiles.
RADIO
They were asking if you were around
How you was, where you could be
found, I told them you were living
downtown, Driving all the old men
crazy
INT HWANS HOUSE - DAY
A smiling Hwan's hearing it.
RADIO
You know the chick that used to
dance a lot, Every night she'd be
on the floor shaking what she'd got
Man when I tell you she was cool,
she was red hot, I mean she was
steaming…
INT JOHNNYS HOUSE - DAY
A smiling Johnny's hearing it.
RADIO
That night over at Johnny's place
Well this chick got up and she
slapped Johnny's face
Man we just fell about the place
If that chick don't want to know,
forget her
JONS HOUSE - DAY
Back at Jon's house, the radio continues.
RADIO
Friday night they'll be dressed to
kill, Down at Dino's bar and grill…
JUANS HOUSE - DAY
Back at Juan's house, the radio continues.
RADIO
The drink will flow and blood will
spill, If the boys want to fight,
you'd better let them…
HWANS HOUSE - DAY
Back at Hwan's house, the radio continues.
RADIO
That jukebox in the corner blasting
out my favorite song, The nights
are getting warmer, it won't be
long
JOHNNYS HOUSE - DAY
Back at Johnny's house, the radio continues.
RADIO
It won't be long till summer comes
Now that the boys are here again,
The boys are back in town…
The song fades out.
INT LAW FIRM - DAY
Elise gets the call a phone call.
ELISE
This is Elise.
She listens. She smiles.
ELISE (CONT'D)
Thank you.
She sets the phone down.
INT CRAIG'S OFFICE - DAY
Craig is in his office. Elise buzzes in.
ELISE (O.S.)
Craig, got a minute?
CRAIG
Sure.
EXT PEBBLE BEACH GOLF COURSE - MORNING
Hwan, Juan, Johnny and Jon are standing on the first tee
waiting.
JON
Nice place to meet just to sign
paperwork.
JUAN
That's what this is about?
HWAN
Probably to finalize the estate.
Closure.
JOHNNY
But we weren't his sons.
HWAN
Doesn't matter, we were named in
the will.
JON
There he is.
Craig finally comes riding up to them in a golf cart.
CRAIG
Sorry I'm late. Traffic.
HWAN
Likely excuse. That little cutie
keeping you busy?
The guys laugh.
CRAIG
Elise and for the most part yes,
but this is about you.
JOHNNY
About us what? Some paperwork you
couldn't send?
CRAIG
There was a mistake made.
JUAN
About the inheritance?
CRAIG
No, about the tests.
JON
What tests?
CRAIG
D.N.A. tests. We took some beer
bottles, but the tests were flawed,
so we took your bloody shirts.
HWAN
And?
CRAIG
And you are brothers.
Disbelief.
JOHNNY
Are you sure?
CRAIG
Absolutely. We had the most
comprehensive tests in the world
done. You men share a father.
JON
So we are brothers?
CRAIG
Technically you are half-brothers.
The camera pans to all the smiling faces. Years of
uncertainly are now clear. They are all changed men now. They
are family. They are all holding back tears.
JOHNNY
Well let's play some golf.
(pause)
My brothers.
They all smile at him, some tears flowing.
FADE OUT
HALF-BROTHERS by Tim Finkbeiner timf248@yahoo.com